Catelyn drags Tyrion through a mountain pass, where they're set upon by hill people or something. Tyrion takes the opportunity to smash one hill person's face in really good. And he seems to make friends with one of the guards that Catelyn picked up in the tavern. She takes him to the Eyrie, which appears to be a castle on top of a giant mountain. It's being ruled by Catelyn's sister Lysa, who's Jon Arryn's widow. She appears to have gone a little crazy, and she's breast-feeding her creepy kid a lot longer than you'd normally expect. She throws Tyrion in a prison cell that's basically cut into the side of the mountain. It's missing a wall!
The good news about Daenerys's pregnancy has reached King Robert, and he wants to get her a present! Well, that's probably overstating it a little, because what he actually wants to do is kill her. Viserys, too, although he honestly sounds more scared of the unborn child. Ned doesn't want to do this, and the council meeting where they argue about it ends with Ned being fired as the Hand of the King. Also, Robert keeps saying words like "Treason," so that's probably a bad sign. So when Jaime Lannister accosts Ned, it ends with Jory getting killed and Ned getting a pole-arm to the leg.
Oh, and it turns out that Renly Baratheon (the king's brother) and the Knight of the Flowers are lovers and they have a long, slow chest-shaving scene. That might be of interest to you.
Okay, let's have a look at these credits. King's Landing, check. There's a stag there, by the way, which is presumably because that's the signature animal of King Robert. And then something new has been added! There's a mountain called "The Eyrie." I'm just glad paying attention to the credits paid off! Then we go off to Winterfell, where I think I can see a wolf's head. Up to the Wall, which doesn't get a totem animal. And finally, over to Vaes Dothrak, which has that horse arch. Got it!
Our story begins in King's Landing, which seems peaceful enough. Perhaps... deceptively so? Actually, it's almost definitely less peaceful than it seems. It would probably have to be on fire to accurately represent what's going on. Lord Stark strides through the tournament grounds and then enters a tent, where Ser Hugh lies dead. I guess that's supposed to be somehow surprising, but I thought he died at the joust itself. He had that giant shard of wood sticking out his neck, and I don't know how efficient the medical profession is on this show. We're reminded that Ser Hugh was wearing his knightly armor for the first time, and also that he had no family. Well, we might not have known that last bit already. I'll be honest with you; I have not been paying nearly as much attention to the genealogy aspect of this show as it thinks I have. I figure there are families that are important and families I don't need to care about yet, you know? Lord Stark seems to think that Ser Hugh was set up to fight the Mountain, but he's told the knights draw straws to pick opponents. Ah, he asks, but who holds the straws? Is he suggesting some kind of professional sleight-of-straw man?
Having dealt with that, Ned walks away from the tent in the company of Ser Barristan, who's that older knight who King Robert was reminiscing with that one time. You remember, he's the guy I misidentified as the Hound. His full name is "Selmy Barristan," which means that I am constantly confusing him with an extremely minor science fiction author with the awesome name of "Manly Bannister." I have fascinating stories to tell about the printing press that Manly Bannister used for his zine, but I guess this probably isn't the right place. Frankly, I'm having trouble finding the right place for all my Manly Bannister anecdotes. It's possible I just like saying "Manly Bannister."
Anyway, Barristan used to be Ned's enemy, which we know because he reminds Ned of that time they fought as enemies. Slick! Ned says that his father told him that Barristan was the best fighter he ever saw, and now that they've exchanged some manly reminiscing, it's time to forward the plot a little bit. So it's established that Ser Hugh's armor was suspiciously nice for someone who until recently was just Jon Arryn's squire. Barristan suggests that maybe Arryn left him some money, but it doesn't sound like he means it. And in other news, King Robert wants to enter the joust tonight. Ned guarantees that's not going to happen, but apparently Robert has a reputation for ignoring the sound advice his Hand gives him.