It's Graduation Day on The Wall! But since everyone in this world is drinking and whoring it up all the time, it's not clear what they do on Graduation Day. I might be thinking of Prom Night. Okay, scratch that whole line of thought. I'll bring it up again when Sansa has a subplot about picking out a prom dress or something. The various Wall recruits are informed that they used to be thieves and rapists (which the show calls "rapers" in an attempt to seem somehow fantasy-based), and some of them had proud families and blah blah blah. The point is that they're now all one family. Jon Snow is looking forward to being a ranger, because it's what he's always wanted. But now he just wants to find his uncle, which suggests that he's not listening to the part of the speech about them all setting aside their old families. Not that I can blame him. Sam says he's going to be a steward, not a ranger. Snow says there's no honor in being a steward, and Sam agrees. "But there's food," he adds, and that seems like a relevant thing to consider. Benjen was a ranger, and he probably got lots of honor. And now he's almost certainly dead. The speech continues, telling the recruits that the men of the Night's Watch live for the realm, not the king. And not glory, either. Everyone is told to think carefully before reciting the vow, because the penalty for desertion is death. Remember Twitchy, from the first episode? A deserter. A dead deserter. So there you go! The recruits can take their vows here in the courtyard, but anyone who keeps the Old Gods can feel free to go to a Godswood just north of the Wall. Jon will be doing that, and so, to everyone's surprise, will Sam. Sam's family has never followed the Old Gods, but he figures that his life hasn't worked out so great so far, so maybe a change of religion is in order. It's worth a try, I guess.
It's time for everyone at the Wall to be assigned a job, which I guess they'll do for the rest of their lives. There are three choices: builders, rangers, and stewards. There might be other choices in the grand history of the Wall, but I'm only going off what they say here, you understand. If "guy who pushes the thing that moves the elevator" is a specific job, nobody got assigned to it this year. Sam, as predicted, is now a steward. But anyone who was making a bundle by betting on the assignments is immediately ruined, because Jon Snow, Mr. Swordplay, is not a ranger. He, too, is a steward! And he's clearly crushed, because he thought he was bound for Greater Things. Ser Allister smirks at him. I think. He's always smirking, so I guess it's possible he was just looking in Jon's direction. With all the jobs handed out, people gather in their groups. Builders over there, rangers over there. Stewards just kind of congregate in the middle, apparently. An old, blind geezer speaks to the stewards and gives them their personal assignments. Sam will be helping him in the rookery. And one guy gets assigned to help "One-Eyed Joe," which I think sounds kind of fun. Don't you want to hang out with One-Eyed Joe? Jon learns that Lord-Commander Mormont has requested him for his personal Steward. He asks if that will involve feeding him breakfast and changing his sheets. It will! He's now completely petulant and asks if he has been taken for a nursemaid, and Blindy cuts him down to size: "We took you for a man of the Night's Watch. But perhaps we were wrong in that." Snow shoves past Sam and stomps off.