Fall Pilot Season: Gary Unmarried
Who's the guy? Funny you should ask. It's their marriage counselor. Gary thinks he's ancient. She expects congratulations. "Congratulations on marrying the person that we both went to to hold our marriage together." Sounds like someone broke some of the rules. The heart apparently knows no such rules. Convenient. Gary drops the bomb that he's dating someone. Allison presumes he's lying. He's not. He concedes that she's "won," and that her prize is a guy who drives a bike with a windshield. The fake crowd goes wild.
Back at Gary's house, he's putting away groceries with help from Louise, who tells Gary that Tom's got a girl in his room and they're "studying." Is she cute? How could Gary ask his daughter that? She informs him that that's degrading. And now there's a joke about Gandhi being hot. Good times.
Up in Tommy's remarkably clean room is a cute blonde girl, Danielle. Tommy's panicking. They go out in the hall. He's freaking out. Wants a way out. Gary suggests talking to her. Gary gives him a pep talk. It's kinda sweet. Then Gary heads downstairs to get the door, asking Louise for a beer. She doesn't want to be an enabler. He thinks bringing him more alcohol is the solution to this problem. At the door is Dr. Crandall (Ed Begley, Jr.), carrying a bike helmet. Now that everything's out in the open, they can talk. Dr. Crandall offers Gary a chance to beat him up. It's therapeutic! Allison walks in to stop the boys from fighting over her. Gary just looks like he wants to leave the room. Crandall encourages Gary to give him his worst. Gary takes this opportunity to make a snide remark about Allison. The door rings again. Just in time.
It's the pizza guy. Nope. It's Vanessa. She's got news she has to share. There's a man in her life, too. Her son. So they're both liars that randomly sleep around. Good! The makings of a perfect relationship. How did Gary not notice a kid's bedroom when painting her house?
Time for the awkward meet-and-greet. Gary introduces Vanessa to his ex-wife and Dr. Crandall. Dr. Crandall starts spilling Gary's secrets from his dream journal. Dr. Crandall wants to help the fledgling couple work out their issues. Vanessa is smitten by the doctor who understands the stresses of single motherhood. Instant therapy session. There's humiliation and deception all around. For Gary, that's a turn-on. Then there's a boring discussion about feelings and stuff, with Gary acting like a man-child who isn't ready for a commitment. He starts freaking out. Runs out of the room.