Alpha Two wanders around the giant holes they left behind, where no enemy ever was, trading insults and recriminations. They're looking for a reason, but there is no reason: it's just autokinesis. A mass delusion that there was something to fight. "Eleven thousand pounds of bombs. That's some serious shock and awe," one says. Fawcett takes wilder and wilder calls from the LT, begging them to justify the attack. One, the gunner I think, holds up a TV antenna, laughing hysterically. "Check it out, y'all. That's all that's left of a hajji tank! You'll get the Navy comm for this one. We could have been overrun!" Burris tells him to fuck off, and tells the team leader, Fawcett, to just make something up. "Damon, don't be a pussy. Fucking call it in. Let's give the LT a tank. He can get his medal, we can get the fuck out of here." But Fawcett won't do it, because that's a combat jack. That's working backwards through the system, pretending there was justification for the attack and trying to fill in the blanks retroactively, which is stupid. "Assassin Two, this is Two Three. Over. We've covered three grid squares, we have nothing. I say again, nothing. How copy?" The gunner guy decides to keep his antenna, maybe pick up some X-Games on his nonexistent TV. Fawcett gets the call that they're being extracted from the non-field of non-war they called in, and the Corporal muses: "If there'd've been tanks here, that would have been fucking cool."
The LT for Alpha Two, whose name I don't know and who barely matters, calls in to Patterson that he's going to try, one more time, to justify the optical illusion and come up with something. "We're pushing three kliks north to Papa Victor 217598, the nearest hamlet, to question the locals on the armor. Over." Patterson copies, and they stop to talk to dudes with goats. "These people are close enough to have sighted the armor," the LT says, which would be true if it ever existed. They stop -- my God the amount of drama going into this ass-backwards shit -- and Two covers the LT while he takes Meesh to go talk to randoms. So far we've not seen the best side of Burris and Fawcett, who are generally the faces of Alpha giving our guys shit, but this scene goes a long way toward justifying this episode spending so much time on them while Brad's somewhere with no shirt on.
Burris and Fawcett have been the Rosencrantz and Guildenstern, but this scene is how you know that for sure. Watching the LT gabber at Meesh and Meesh pulling his usual shit with the random goatherders, they put on a little show that Carver and Herc would be proud of, here presented without commercial interruption because it is awesome.