Generation Kill

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A | 1 USERS: A+
YOU GRADE IT
Sorta Damocles

(Um, okay, but way weaker. So you're saying it's okay to act like a total fuck-up and no matter how many times people tell you this, you have to actually engineer a hindsight issue? Because this is Godfather, and you know that once that happens he can't censure the person, because it reflects poorly on him as their CO in the first place. "Godfather didn't believe the fifteen reports that Captain McGraw was a pants-shitting lunatic from all manner of high-functioning, intelligent grown-ass men, but once Captain McGraw pulled down his pants and literally pissed on Godfather's leg, Gentlemen, Godfather knew that this was not in any way Godfather's fault, either strategically or in execution. What would General Mattis do, you might ask, as Godfather often does, and that is indeed what Godfather had to ask himself. And what Godfather realized was that Godfather always meant for Captain America to piss on Godfather's leg, because Godfather knew that this was exactly what the enemy was not expecting, in terms of the A-O of Godfather's leg getting pissed on, and Godfather was pleased to report to General Mattis that Operation Godfather's Leg Getting Pissed On By A Roaring Retard was a complete success, with zero casualties.")

"Now the same support I extend to Captain McGraw is extended to all my officers. Lieutenant Fick, for example." (Oh for Christ's sake, is basically where Evan starts heading at this point.) "I'm sure you're aware there's some in this Battalion who feel that Lieutenant Fick is unfit for command." Evan laughs, because well yeah, when you've got four people in the entire Platoon actually closing the loop and attempting to correct for their idiot superiors, those generally will be the four people you hear about from said superiors: "You should consider your sources, Sir."

"So what happens to my command if I respond to every complaint made against one of my men?" Evan nods sadly, because we are motherfucking done here. "It's a terrible feeling to be the man sending other people into combat. Terrible feeling." Evan wonders what the fuck that has to do with anything they were just talking about, and maybe Godfather's just had a stroke or given in to senile dementia or something, because what? Evan shakes his hand and gets the fuck out of there, and Godfather fully yells at him as he's leaving, "But something else I'm struggling with... is the excitement I felt. Getting shot at." (WTF?) "It's just something I hadn't anticipated about war. Did you?" Evan searches for the words to describe on just how many levels Godfather can take his faulty fucking reasoning and weird fetishism and ass-covering double-talk and shove them where only Mattis has gone before, but gives up and grabs his bags because what's the point? Godfather watches him leave and nods to himself, like, "Good one." Fucking idiot.

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Generation Kill

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