Get Real

Episode Report Card
Pamie: D | Grade It Now!

We see the twenty-year-old joint reflected in Kenny's Risky Business shades. "Are you going for the gold, or what?" Victor asks him. They are standing in the boys' bathroom in the School Without Classes. It's also the Bathroom Without Visitors, because they have no problems flinging this (long) joint around the bathroom debating its merits. The next few minutes read like a PSA as Kenny worries about getting addicted or busted. "I mean, how often do kids our age get to smoke dope?" Kenny asks. "Okay, every day, but that's a whole 'nother story." Victor says they could smoke it and have a great time. Not busted or addicted, but "changed forever." He declares the joint to be an "invitation to destiny." What. Ever. Kenny. Your brother is a bone-headed skater. Quick tip: Check his sock drawer. Smoke up, kid. Don't waste your first time on ancient weed. And quit calling it dope; you sound like your parents. And take off that stupid-ass jacket. Who are you, Joan Jett? Jesus, someone needs to help this kid out. Where's Cameron?

Well, like every other student in the School Without Classes, Cameron is at his locker again. He opens it and sees that his skateboard is gone. He starts glaring around the hallway at the silent, locker-checking others. "Who the hell took my skateboard?" we hear him "think." We see Sideburns follow Meghan out of a class and leer all close to the back of her neck. She's looking down at something. Tucked in the crook of her arm is a French schoolbook. Nice try, girlie -- you already said you take Spanish. Cameron is outraged. He's got to put one hand on his forehead. So angry. He tucks back a bit of grease. Sideburns keeps mouth-breathing next to Meghan until she walks away. Then Sideburns lifts his head and stares straight into Cam's eyes. They're like, across the school from each other, but whatever. We watch Sideburns leave in slow motion, just like his cool Sixth-Grade Slow Burn. "Sykes!" Cameron shouts, like he's auditioning for Lethal Weapon Five. He slams his locker shut and starts running after him, but the Silent Schoolkids are like zombies! Suddenly they're everywhere and Cameron can't go anywhere without bumping into one of them! There's so much locker-checking and milling that Cam might lose sight of Sideburns! He does a quick 360 and then bumps right into Principal Foreshadowing. Coffee is spilled. PF says that Cameron must have been running right to class. Cam agrees that he was on his way to Biology. He drops some science like Galileo dropped an orange and walks off. He opens a door to a classroom, but we do a quick edit so that he actually walks into the World's Largest Kitchen. Pssssyche! There ain't no biology class! Fool.

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Get Real




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