Get Real
Crime And Punishment

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Crime And Punishment

Have I mentioned that I've never met someone who drove a Jeep that wasn't an asshole?

"What did you do?" Cameron asks Alicia as he starts the Jeep and screeches it into reverse. Fade to white.

Some waiter is serving a party of twenty whether his pain goes away or not. Hey, buddy. Try a season of Get Real. Quit your bitching and take your Advil. At least you have some sort of pain reliever. My cats won't even sit in the room with me anymore when I watch this show.

Mitch asks what time it is. Mary says it's twenty minutes past their curfew. Mitch runs down through the punishments he's about to dish out. He says she should just go to sleep. Mary says something about how ironic it is that she's not sleepy. That's not really irony, but whatever. They start talking about how they were almost done with all of this. They would have been alone for the first time in eighteen years. I guess Meghan had a birthday or they forgot about when she had her or something, because Meghan was seventeen for the past eight episodes. Mary was looking forward to being a couple without kids. Mitch says he agrees, since they sort of skipped the "whole newlywed thing." Hey guys? Remember Kenny? He's only fifteen. You're not done yet. And it's not like Cameron is smart enough to leave the house. Mitch says that he thought they were just about to get to the part of their lives that they had put on hold. Mary asks how they are going to do this. Mitch says he doesn't know, but they will. They hug. Fade to white.

Cameron takes Alicia back to "the rehab place." As they walk in Latino Bad Dad is sitting on the couch as if he's been there all night instead of looking for her. She walks in, checks her manual on "Rehab Entrances," manages a "Daddy?" and then collapses into his arms. Some orderly-type people start to take her away. Cameron is all upset. "I don't want to be here," she says to her father. "Look, I know, but I gotta go," Cameron says to LBD. "Where did you take her?" LBD asks. "A party. A stupid party. I didn't think this was gonna happen." "You took a girl out of rehab to go to a party, what did you think was going to happen?" Cameron goes on about how she said she was okay. "She's an addict!" LBD is enraged. He says that Alicia will say anything to get Cameron to do stuff for her. Cameron says he knows that now, and that he's sorry. "Maybe I should have told you about her addiction. Part of me is still trying to protect her." LBD is going on about how the best thing for her, if he really loves her, is to leave her alone. She needs people who can say no to her, and that's not either of them. Oh, you guys know the rest of this scene too, don't you? All right, I'll try to print it out without quitting. LBD says that he knows the look on Cameron's face. We can't help but see it too with this excruciating close-up they have on him. "That look on your face -- that feeling as if somebody just punched you in the gut because you believed...trusted. That's me. That's me every day." "I'm sorry," Cameron says again. "I'm sorry." He walks off and we hear sirens. LBD looks away as a soprano begins with "You're sailing away to another shore."

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