Get Real

Episode Report Card
Pamie: D | 364 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
Denial

Meghan and Clay enter the garage as Clay says he cannot understand why she doesn't agree with him. "The mud cover is the shiny red nose and he's outed when the mud falls off." "No, Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer is not a gay allegory!" "What are you talking about? He's ostracized by the other reindeer and has to head off into the world with his little 'elf' friends?" He makes the quote marks with his fingers. "Yeah, because he's got a shiny red nose, that's all." "It's a symbol. On the island of misfit toys, Herbie and Rudolph share a bed." Meghan continues throwing one-liter bottles of Pepsi ("Hi, Sis!") at him and calls him "twisted." He's about to start another debate but Quentin Tarantino runs outside, looks up into the sky and screams, "I'm so sorry for what I've created! I never meant to cause so much harm!" His prayers are answered, so Clay doesn't finish his Frosty the Snowman story. Gracias, St. Clare. He drops all of the Pepsi bottles but one. She grabs another. He says that she has two choices. She can either "listen to the truth about Frosty..." They both open their one-liters. "Or what?" Meghan shakes up her bottle and shoots Pepsi all over Clay. He does the same. They are covered in carbonated syrup. Much screaming, arm grabbing, face wiping. They stop giggling and stare into each other's eyes. They kiss. They keep kissing. Much grabbing and kissing. Borrowing a lesson from Ally McBeal, Elizabeth stands in the doorway and watches them. Her face says, "You know, they say we won't be able to get much Pepsi after this Y2K thing, you wasters. I wish I hadn't suggested that you two go in there alone." She leaves as Meghan pulls away from Clay and her drippy soda hair says that they have a problem. He says that she's all he ever thinks about. He can't help himself. Meghan looks herself over like she's Carrie at the prom, and storms out of the room. I just went and got my journal from my freshman year of high school, and my suspicions are correct. I did write this exact scene when I was fourteen and totally wanted Tyson Heder to kiss me but he had some girlfriend. I want royalties, dammit. We fade to white and go to commercial, so we don't actually get to see Clay and Meghan explain why they were partaking in the Joy of Cola.

Get Real

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