"I'm a horrible, horrible person," Meghan "No, It's About ME!" Green moans to Slut Girl. Meghan says that Ferret is about to get hurt and it's all HER fault. "It's like, it's this huge guilt-thing hanging over me." Uh, Meghan? Linda Tripp called. She said to shut your whiny-ass mouth. Slut Girl says she'd rather have a guy tell her he wasn't interested in her than pretend. "She's gonna hate me!" Meghan whines, not for one second thinking about how OTHER PEOPLE FEEL. "Happily, you still have me," Slut Girl beams. "No offense, but that doesn't help." Yes offense, and shut up. Slut Girl points out that if Ferret had found out about Clay and Meghan before he broke up with her then Ferret would never talk to Meghan again. This is all too much for poor Meghan. She whimpers. Slut Girl offers that at least Meghan will have someone to kiss for New Year's. More whimpering.

Mary is giving MC Lyte the lowdown. She can't do the party. "You've got to be kidding." Mary says that she's pregnant and it's affecting her work in ways she didn't know were possible. She found a replacement for MC. MC says that she doesn't want a replacement. "I hired you. After you passed yourself off as a professional." Mary says she is a professional and that's why this is so difficult. She says that she almost got in an accident on her way over and she just can't keep pushing herself this way. "So you're backing out seven days before the party." "Right now this baby, my baby, has to come first. And if that means that I have to stop working that that's what I have to do." MC Lyte is hella pissed, yo. Mary exhales, because life for her is an endless chore of part-time work, baby making and shopping. And I just feel so special that I've been invited to get to know this wonderful woman, this beautiful specimen of human decency, kindness and family values. She has made the ultimate sacrifice, and we really should honor her, nay -- worship her for the way she's chosen to live her life. Thank you, Mary Green, for being the Spirit of the Holidays.

Elizabeth asks Kenny to taste her food and see if it has too much cumin. Kenny tells her to ask Cam since he's got seniority. Fighting, fighting, "Bite me!" "There's the Christmas spirit," says Grandma with the cap.