Get Real
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Back to Mitch. Sorry, was I taking away from Mitch's glory? What goes around comes around. He says that Jeff was a great kisser. He says he was full of life. He tells of the time that Jeff was over and kissed Lily and told her he loved her. In the Green Family tradition he proceeds to turn the entire eulogy into a tearful speech to his family as the five-note Get Real jingle continues in clarinet. "Meghan, honey, I love you." She cries. "Cameron, I love you." Cameron's face puffs up. "Kenny, I love you, son." "Jeff," he adds as an afterthought, "I love you, too." They play the CD. It's "Afternoon Delight." He mouths to Mary that he loves her as well. We arrive at the reception to find the big Uh-Oh. The birthday party and the funeral reception have been switched, and Joanne's house now looks like a carnival. "Jewish funerals are awesome," Cameron says. I guess he read the Jewish Book of Why as well. The clown comes into the reception area and asks, "Who died?" because he's obviously a clown of very little brain and we needed some humor to lighten this Very Special Episode. Mary talks to the pissed-off Mom.

Mitch is sitting in Jeff's car as Kenny approaches. He offers to help clean out the car. Mary apologizes to Joanne. Kenny holds up a cassette tape he found in the glove compartment and asks who the Police are and mentions that the one in the middle looks like Sting. Kenny says that Mitch's eulogy was amazing. "Well, I meant everything that I said, "Mitch says, "Especially the 'I love you' part." They have a good hug as I have a good laugh. Mitch takes Jeff's golf clubs out of the trunk and tells Kenny he isn't going anywhere. Random Woman is bothering Meghan about which college she's going to. Mary tells her Meghan is taking a year off. "I love you, Mom," Meghan thinks, obviously not learning the lesson taught in today's Very Special Episode. Meghan tries to talk to Lily, but she's holed up in her room. "Can I get you anything?" Meghan asks. Lily opens the door so we can all say in unison, "My dad." Meghan curls into the fetal position on the floor and shoves her fingertips in her eyes to make them water.

Cameron, Kenny and Meghan carry Jeff's chair up to Lily's room. Meghan smiles because she's proud of herself. They hug. Joanne and Lily change the water bottle together, spilling just a drop. "But I still reserve the right to miss my husband," Joanne says to Mary. "Permission granted," Mary responds, as it is obvious at this point that the Greens are the center of the universe and we mere mortals cannot feel or move without first making sure it doesn't disrupt their petty problems. Mary has a "crazy idea." Cue slow motion shots of kids jumping up and down on a trampoline as the funeral people watch from the window. "Jeff would have loved this party," Microsoft's Script Churner spits out for Joanne to have to say. Cameron jumps on the trampoline as Meghan sees how Cam is like Jeff. Mitch is jumping as well. The screen freezes on his face as the screen fades to white.

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Get Real

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