Get Real
Tough Love

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Tough Love

Music plays while Cameron empties out his locker. He uses Sikes' old box. Principal Foreshadowing watches over him. I keep rolling my eyes. This kid is sixteen. Isn't there a law that he has to be in school somewhere? I mean, they can't just deny him an education. You can't spell Green Kid without "GED." Kenny brings Cam his gym stuff. Cam is all teary. Kenny acts like Cam is just going on vacation and says he'll see him at home. Slut Girl flirts with Cam one last time before he has to leave. For the last time, GET THESE KIDS OUT OF VESTS! Principal Foreshadowing walks behind Cameron as he leaves. Well, that school is going to save a fortune in "No Skateboarding" signs. Cameron gets into Mary's car and thanks her for being so cool to him when he was such a pain in the ass. He has to take off his seatbelt for this scene so we know he means it. The backs of the car sats are, like, gone. Cam kisses Mary's head again. Mary asks him to not screw up his life and waste it. He promises he won't. He asks what he's going to do about Mitch. Mary is all, "not my problem, can't fix it, can't rescue you on that one" and says that he'll have to talk to Mitch to solve that one. Mary is like a Bounce Dryer Sheet, man. Nothing sticks to her. Five-note jingle.

Steve has the video camera now and he's asking Cam, Kenny and Meghan who their favorite uncle is. Oh, this scene is painfully trite. After much "joking" they finally admit that it's him, since he's their only uncle. Meghan's giant bay windows are always covered in condensation. Perhaps it's all the hot air those kids generate. Maybe it's all the huffing and exhaling. Maybe it's the Malcolm In the Middle set right next door celebrating its Neilsen Ratings. Meghan takes the camera and demands that Steve promise to be at their house next Christmas. He gets his liar face on and says he promises. They rejoice, as if they can't see that Steve's liar face is just as transparent as any other Green member's. Why do I bother? Tonight's soundtrack is brought to you by the ABC Afterschool Special, "Mommy, Why Can't I Play the Flute?"

Teleporting. Mitch and Steve are at the Sin and Renovation. Steve declares that he's going to go to Mexico. Mitch says that Steve must have planned this all along: "You wanna run, Steve? Run. I don't wanna have anything to do with it." He exhales. "You need money. I feel so stupid, you know, you manipulated me from the minute you walked in the door." He says that all that stuff about their mother and the family was a lie. "That's not true," Steve says. Mitch: "Yeah, well, what's true Steve? You know? Really. Tell me, because uh, I don't know anymore." Steve pulls out the Cliché Machine and says both of the following sentences: "I'm all alone, I don't have anyplace to go." "You're my brother, Mitch, you're all I've got." It seems there's a mix-up here and that those were two alternative lines that Steve actually said one after another. There are a few more sentences starting with the word "Look" as Steve says he doesn't want to go to jail. He knows he messed up, but he needs Mitch now. "I'm scared. Please help me." And that'll do it for the available lines from Wayward Siblings: When You're Asking For Help "One Last Time". He asks Mitch to help him run. Thirty-second pause. Fade to white. Commercial.

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