Everyone has arrived for dinner. I guess Rory's just about forgiven Richard entirely, because there are no apologies, no conversation, no shared looks, nothing. Just a big hug. Great. Glad we went through all of that, then. Lorelai, however, is angry enough for all four of them. She keeps counting down. Richard reintroduces Natalie (from the auction, who called Emily "The Cobra"), and her husband Doesn'tMatter. They also have a couple in from France, Claude and Monique. Monique doesn't speak any English, which is always a good reason to come and celebrate Thanksgiving, isn't it? Claude is her translator. Richard speaks fluent French, it seems, and the three of them do a little Frenching as Richard introduces his fille and petite-fille. I know très petite French, so the closed-captioning looks like Monique and Claude are conversing about how she's pretending not to know any English.
Everyone sits. Claude asks Rory if she speaks any French. She admits that she speaks "tout petit peu." Oh. It's not trés petite? Lorelai admits that all she knows is "Voulez-vous coucher avec moi, se soir?" Everyone blanches at Lorelai's rather stupid joke, since half the room hasn't heard of Lady Marmalade, so Monique has to explain in French what Lorelai means. Claude approves of Lorelai's very funny ways. Why are we meeting these people? Lorelai asks for a martini. Doesn'tMatter asks Claude if this is his first Thanksgiving. Claude says that it is -- that he's seen it in the movies and zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. Oh, I'm sorry. This episode is like Thanksgiving dinner. Five minutes of excitement that it's started and then one long, sleepy fade until a blissful hibernation. Doesn'tMatter gets all patriotic, saying we have a lot to give thanks for in this country, unlike France, apparently. What's with the tone, DM? Getting a little superior on those guests. Claude's just happy to have Cuban cigars, French champagne, and gorgeous women every single day. Take that, USA. He thanks the room for the great company. Lorelai: "Douglas, Richard, leave us, won't you?" Richard is again confused, and Emily explains that it's another joke. Natalie tells Lorelai she has her mother's wit. "Sometimes I wish she'd give it back," Emily quips, wagging cigar missing. Rory mentions that this is their fourth dinner. Richard thanks Lorelai for fitting them in. Lorelai says he's the main event. She counts down again as she sips.