In case there was any wonder who the best guy in Stars Hollow is, Luke literally helps an old lady cross the street. He then opens his shed to find -- Jess's car is gone. Surprisingly, there's no puddle of oil on the cement.
Luke's. Luke reports the theft over the phone. He admits that he doesn't know how long it's been missing, but that he saw it last week. "Just...just call me when you find it," he concludes, hanging up. It's like he called Kirk to find the car. Hell, maybe he did.
Paris concludes the first tertiary plot to have a resolution this season: Chester asked Tana out on a date: "She's throwing up now." Rory packs a suitcase, saying she's going home for the weekend. "Just to get away from me?" Paris asks. No, Paris, Rory pretty much goes home every other day. And this time she appears to have no concern over where Lane's staying. Rory says she's got to go home for Emily's dinner, followed by the Stars Hollow Firelight Festival, which she hasn't missed since she was one: "So, not seeing you -- well, quite frankly, is just a fringe benefit." Paris says she feels awful and doesn't understand why Rory's so upset about this. She tried calling Jamie, but he won't answer the phone. She says that Asher seems to be serious about the two of them. He's spending a couple of months teaching at Oxford over the summer, and recently asked Paris what her plans for the summer were, so maybe he's thinking about asking her along. ["He's so not. And Paris is going to be shattered when he doesn't." -- Wing Chun] Rory says she has to hit the road. Paris admits that it was Asher's accent that made her fall for him: "I'm such an Anglophile." When she was a kid, she was in love with Neil Kinnock, the former head of the Labour party: "Teeth like a horse, but oh! That voice!" Then it was Roger Moore. She goes back to talking about the professor again. "He TiVos Frontline. So we can watch it together." Rory tries to leave, but Paris pounces: "I never wanted to hurt Jamie. I just don't know how to do these things. I'm not very nice sometimes. I hope Asher doesn't see that in me." I do think Paris is one of the most well-written, complex characters on television. That has so much to do with the talents of Liza Weil. Rory tells Paris she just wants her to be happy. Paris tells Rory that she is happy.
Rory comes home to a very loud house. Music blares. I'm assuming we're set up for Rory to walk in on Digger and Lorelai, but no. Lorelai comes down, dressed, asking Rory if she was supposed to meet Lorelai there. "No, I was a surprise," Rory says. Lorelai: "As was your conception." Rory: "I'll just be two minutes." Lorelai: "As was your conception." Again: Squick. Mom, I don't need to know that at all. Rory asks Lorelai how her date with Digger was. Lorelai says it was fun, and that Digger makes her laugh. Rory likes that. Lorelai says that Digger is very off-center, and that it's been a while since she's been with someone like that. She tells Rory that she's telling Emily tonight about her and Digger. "Very brave," says Rory. Ah. I see now that Rory changed clothes during this scene. I take back what I said in the recaplet. Rory notices that there's bread in the kitchen cabinet. She says that's weird. And then there's food, like cheese, in the fridge. Rory says they never had real food in the house when Rory was growing up. Lorelai claims that they always had food. Rory says they had leftovers from take-out, like cold pizza. Lorelai tells Rory to chill out on the details. As she ushers Rory out of the kitchen, Rory notices a tomato on the counter.