Gilmore Girls
A Family Matter

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Jess Fans, Unite!

Luke's. Kirk is at a table. Luke takes this moment to double over onto the counter and rest his head in his hands. The hippie woman comes down from upstairs and asks Luke if he forgot about her. Luke says he's really busy, and asks Kirk if he wants another piece of pie. Kirk says he's fine, and then delivers a monologue about the classic mid-morning lull, and how nobody will be in the diner for at least another half-hour. The woman calls Luke upstairs. Luke delivers the only-heard-in-scripts line, "Comin', Sis."

Luke's apartment. He calls for his sister. Liz is her name. Liz is in the closet, pulling out the old baggie of weed she hid back there when she was young. Remember the woman who played the kid-dumping, hippie, free-loving, kinda druggie sister on ER? Yeah, she's playing exactly that same character here. Luke freaks out about the pot, and Liz promises that she doesn't do it anymore. She tells him to throw it away. Luke doesn't want the garbage man to see the pot. Liz says the garbage man sold her the pot in the first place. Liz tells Luke he looks good, and asks if she looks good. She says she's really good. She made coffee. Luke doesn't drink coffee. She asks him to watch her drink coffee. She says she hasn't seen him in two years. "Three years," Luke corrects her. He asks what she's doing here. She says she thought she'd check up on him, and she's got her high-school reunion this weekend. She has a job, and she just moved into a new apartment with a patio big enough that she can finally get a dog. Luke interrupts to guess that she's got a new boyfriend, who's really good, and that this one is for real and it's really love. Luke's heard it all before, and he doesn't want to hear it again. Every time Liz finds The One, she winds up with her bank account cleaned out and her television stolen. Luke always ends up being the one cleaning her up. Liz asks to talk about something else. Luke asks about her job. She makes jewelry, selling it at Ren Fairs. Luke can't take this. He says he has to go back to work. He asks if she's talked to Jess lately. Jess sent Liz a letter; he's with his father. Liz says that Jess is eighteen, and that you can't tell him anything. Luke: "You can't if you don't try." Liz says she did try. No, she gave up, Luke argues. Liz thought Luke would be better for Jess than she was. Luke tells her how Jess lied about everything, to the point where Luke had to steal Jess's car in the middle of the night, hiding it in Luke's dad's old garage to trick Jess into going to school and graduating, which only succeeded in making Jess run off "to live with the bum who abandoned him." Luke sighs into his seat. Liz tells Luke he tried. Luke says he's great at trying. Liz leaves, telling Luke she's staying with "crazy Carrie Duncan," who once made out with Luke at homecoming. Luke swears he didn't. Liz laughs and says it was really good to see him, and that he does look good. She'll make sure Carrie knows that. The strummy-strummy-la-la's take over until we're...

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Gilmore Girls

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