Gilmore Girls
A Messenger, Nothing More

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Smoke 'Em If You've Got 'Em

The whinny of the Dragonfly. Fake Kids are playing Chinese Checkers with Michel, who is bored. The kids are bouncing with excitement, and every time Michel talks, they fake-giggle to each other. Fake Girl asks Michel if he'd pretend to get all mad and throw the board again when he loses. "Yeah!" interjects Fake Boy. Lorelai, dressed in a pink and black dress that makes her look like she put something on inside out, asks Michel for double-A batteries. Michel snaps that he can't play Chinese Checkers with all these distractions. Lorelai is upset that they're still not vacuuming that little spot. Maybe it's time to do it yourself, Lorelai. Michel tells Lorelai where to find batteries. Fake Boy jumps Michel's marbles (Dirty!). "Damn!" Michel shouts, and Lorelai immediately explains that water is contained by what Michel just said. It's Michel's turn again. Lorelai frets that the dining-room tables are "always, always, always" out of place. She starts moving the tables around, clearing plates, doing everything but dusting that one spot in the corner, until Sookie seizes her and pulls her into the pantry.

Sookie is mad that Lorelai cleared a plate: "You've gone nutty!" Sookie is worried that she's going to make Lorelai mad, but knows she has to tell her friend that she's become a crazy control freak. Lorelai's doing everybody else's job. She even rearranged Sookie's refrigerator, switching meats and vegetables. Lorelai has turned into Emily. This accusation does not sit well with Lorelai, who would never think she was anything like her mother. Yesterday when I did the dishes while talking to the cats about where I should hang a clock...that's when I knew I had turned into my mother. You allow the fear five seconds, and then you have to move on. Sookie tells Lorelai she has to go home because she keeps falling asleep in her office -- once on a stapler, leaving a "Swingline" impression on her skin all day. (Best line reading of the episode.) Lorelai admits that she's feeling burned out. She says she'll take a break. Lorelai then turns into me: "Not this week, because stuff's been piling up. Not next week, because...God." Sookie pushes Lorelai out of the Dragonfly, declaring her break to be right now. Lorelai complains that she doesn't have anyone to hang out with. Sookie promises she'll hang out with Lorelai sometime this week, since she needs a break, too. And you know, television babies can always wait to be fed. Lorelai beams, happy to be released. We hear Michel shout as a Chinese Checkers board flies by in the background. "Do it again! Do it again!" cheer the Fake Kids. Sookie tells Lorelai to hold it together and then leave. Lorelai shields her eyes and runs away. We watch Sookie walk down a hallway because, why not.

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Gilmore Girls

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