Gilmore Girls
Always A Godmother, Never A God

Episode Report Card
Al Lowe: B+ | 1 USERS: A+
You're The Baptized!

In the brightly adorned and strangely wallpapered pool house, Rory is also just waking up with the reprehensible Logan. Her alarm goes off and he tells her to go back to sleep. She explains that she has to go to the baptism, and doesn't want to because she'll have to see her mom. He suggests she blow it off. KILL. He WOULD blow it off, which is Reason #2,000,000 that I hate him. Reason #2,000,0001? His hairless chest. Gross. She goes to her closet, pulls out two dresses and asks him, "Which goes better with a baby?" See what they did there?

Back at the Hep Alien apartment, Lane's trying to read through the manual for the recording equipment while Brian reads a magazine and pfTL watches TV. They tell her she's wasting her time -- that only R2D2 could decipher that thing. "No," she says, "you just have to spend more than six minutes trying to figure it out before giving up." Exactly. Lane, please get a new place to live. Maybe Lane can move above Luke's when he moves in with Lorelai.

Lane's still reading when Rory knocks and comes in. The two guys barely acknowledge her, making them just as bad as Logan and turning me into a general man-hater. Rory explains that she's on her way to the baptism, and Lane says that Mrs. Kim would be proud of such religious behavior. pfTL asks if it's true that Rory would get to keep the kid if something happened to his parents. "I'm just doing it as a favor for Sookie," she says, shrugging. Good, good. It matters to no one that godparenting actually has meaning and that agreeing to it means something other than agreeing to show up somewhere for an hour one day.

Lane and Rory go into Lane's room and catch up. Their conversation is weird and stilted, and it depresses me. It's clear that they are growing apart. I blame Logan. They have awkward hair chat. Lane likes Rory's bangs (which are awesome) and says that they are very Marianne Faithfull. "Thanks," Rory says. "I'm hoping Mick Jagger notices." Hee. Rory asks about the tour, and about Zach, and the awkwardness continues. Rory asks if uh, the "status" has changed between pfTL and Lane, and she says no, they're still not having sex: "Though I did tell Zach that he could tell the guys we were doing it. It's a little more rock and roll." Rory says she's a good girlfriend. NO. Wha? Why? I...hate...cannot take it...sigh. Y'all, what is wrong with these girls? I know this is the way dumb girls act, but aren't Lane and Rory supposed to be like, all smart and shit? Isn't this why we like the show? Whatever, I hate it. Lane asks about Logan and Rory starts blathering about how Logan is a constant surprise, moves a mile a minute, and gets bored easily. Like a puppy? Because that's what he sounds like to me. If he actually pees on her, will she dump him? Because it's only a matter of time. Lane asks if it's serious between them, and Rory says it's "seriously exciting." Lane asks if it's been hard with him still at Yale and Rory...not. Rory says that taking time off was a great decision for her, and that it's all good. She just wishes her mom could understand. Child, your mom does not understand because it makes no sense. You didn't need to take time off. You loved school! "I doubt that she will talk to me again until I am back in the dorm room with a course catalogue on my lap," Rory adds. "Maybe we'll never talk again." Lane says it will blow over, and seriously tries to console her friend. She says that the rift is just nature's way of making up for Lorelai and Rory's going so long without fighting. Rory smiles, like the old Rory. "I've missed you," she says. Lane says she's missed her, too. They hug, and agree to never go this long again without talking. They are back to their old selves, and Rory says she wants to hear all about the tour. "Let's start with that whole three boys and no shower thing," Lane says, and Rory echoes my "Oh, Lord."

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Gilmore Girls




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