Lorelai and Rory carry their baskets through Stars Hollow as Lorelai beams how great it is that this festival always takes place the day after trash day. Then all of the stuff you would have just thrown away gets put in the basket. GG Heads note: trash day is Saturday. Lane walks up and says that she's figured everything out. She's having her cousin David come to bid on her basket, which is the basket her mother made, full of health food. She has a real basket that's for Henry. She's giving this basket to Rory to hold until she goes on her "picnic" with David, at which time she'll switch boys and have her real picnic with a real basket with Henry for her first official date. The basket she made for Henry holds meatball heroes, chips, a change of clothes, makeup, makeup remover, and three temporary tattoos. She leaves to sneak back into her house. Lorelai gets all nostalgic about the days when she used to lie to her mother about a boy. She says she had a boy hide in her closet while Emily prattled on all night. She eventually pretended to get sick to her stomach long enough for Emily to leave the room so that the boy could sneak out and jump out the window, where he fell off a tree and broke his leg. "Ah, to be young again," Lorelai smiles.
Cardigan Man is running the auction, of course. All thirty people of Stars Hollow have arrived. The first basket we see auctioned is Lane's, i.e. the one that MamaLane packed. Lane gives a head motion to cousin David, who understands that he's to bid on this basket. He makes a bid. Kirk tries to up the bid. MamaLane gives Kirk a fierce stink-eye. Kirk backs down with an immediate "withdrawn," and David wins the basket. Cardigan Man reminds David that he can always stick a couple of rolls of toilet paper in the basket and put it in his bathroom for a decorative convenience. David escapes Cardigan Man just in time. Rory's is next, and Cardigan Man reminds the crowd that good things come in small packages, like Rory's basket. "How badly does he want to be hosting a game show?" Lorelai asks. Cardigan Man starts the bidding at three dollars. Before Rory can finish protesting, CuteDean has upped the bid to five. Jess bids ten. Everybody stares at Jess. Cardigan Man asks if he hears fifteen. Jess answers by raising the bid to twenty. Cardigan Man asks for twenty-five. CuteDean raises it to thirty. Cardigan Man stops to tell the boys they don't seem to understand the concept of bidding. Jess bids forty. CuteDean bids fifty. Cardigan Man reminds them that the basket is very tiny. I'll leave that dirty joke alone. Jess bids seventy-five. CuteDean's face does something very strange when he's angry. He bids eighty. Rory says that CuteDean doesn't have eighty dollars. Jess bids ninety. CuteDean has to stop bidding. "Sold to the nice, young hoodlum in the back for ninety dollars," Cardigan Man celebrates. Lorelai tries to think of the positive part of this situation, but can't really come up with anything. Rory says she'd better go talk to CuteDean. Jess marches in triumph past CuteDean as Rory walks up. CuteDean snorts, watches Jess hold Rory's tiny basket, and storms off.