Gilmore Girls
Blame Booze And Melville

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Sara M: B- | Grade It Now!
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We Blame Daniel Palladino

The staff files out, leaving Mitch and Rory behind. He tells her that his work at the paper is almost done, so he won't be around very much after next week. Now would be a good time for Rory's performance evaluation. "I'd love your feedback!" says Rory. It turns out that she won't, at all. Mitch starts that he's worked with a lot of young people over the years, and developed a "gut sense" about whether they'll be able to make it in journalism. Rory smiles, eagerly anticipating Mitch's high praise of her mad journalism skillz. She wonders if he will say that she is THE finest specimen of young reporter he has ever encountered, or just ONE of the best. "I have to tell you," says Mitch, "you don't got it." Ouch! Rory's face slowly falls. Mitch adds that he could be wrong, but probably not. Rory doesn't have the "drive" to "put [her]self out there." Like at the meeting -- Rory didn't say a word. "I wasn't sure if I should!" says Rory. "Exactly," says Mitch. He points out that Harry jumped right in, but that Rory didn't, even though she had quite a few opportunities to. Rory points out that she's just an intern, and didn't think it was her place to say anything. I can see that side of the argument, but there was that WIDE OPEN space for her to say something when Mitch suggested recruiting Yale students, and Mitch even turned and looked at her, and she just sat there. "I've always done what's asked of me," says Rory. Mitch says that that's not always good enough. Rory would make a great assistant, though. Ouch ouch. ["That's not such a bad assessment. I would love a great assistant. Especially one who worked for free, like Rory." -- Wing Chun] Mitch says he is sorry to tell Rory this, but he thinks honesty is "healthy." "I should get back," says Rory, picking up her stuff to leave. Mitch says he knows that what he said to Rory must have been tough to hear, but that he may have just done Rory a "big favor." "Oh. Okay. Thanks," says Rory, and walks out. You know, all she had to do was say something like, "Yes, because now I know what I have to do to be better," or just something like that that showed even tiniest little bit of spark or drive, but she didn't. She just took it and left. And that's why Mitch was exactly right about her.

We now join the meeting of the town elders, already in progress. I'm sad to report that the meeting takes place in a steam room, which means that we get to see Kirk, Taylor, and some other anonymous old men wearing nothing but towels, their bodies glistening with perspiration. Luke's there too, wearing his standard uniform of flannel and a baseball cap. Kirk's got some weirdness going on with his chest. It's impossible to describe, and not even remotely appealing, so I'll just leave it at that. Kirk explains his side of the argument: the house should be listed for sale for everyone to see, and the best possible bidder should get it. Luke's side is that he can't think with all this steam around. An elder says that Luke could take off some clothes to cool off. Luke refuses. Kirk says thatLuke probably has body issues. Kirk could use some body issues. Luke says that he should get the house because he and Taylor had an agreement. Kirk says that he's got deeper pockets, while Luke needs "therapy and probably pills." What the hell, Kirk? Why is he such an obstinate little child? I don't think he even wants the house so much as he wants to screw Luke over, which doesn't make any sense. From the corner of the bench, a man with a towel completely covering his bowed head says that Luke should get the house. Anonymous Elder says that Luke wants the house more, and that he's known both Luke's father and grandfather. He also knows that Luke wants the house for himself and Lorelai. Luke starts to get pissed at Taylor for spreading gossip around, but Anonymous Elder says that they've all watched Luke "pine for Lorelai for nine long years. He wanted her while she went through her many relationships. He won her." Luke smiles smugly. Now, says Anonymous Elder, Luke wants the house to raise their children in. Kirk says that he can raise children in the house, too. Yeah, like himself. Anonymous Elder says that Kirk will find another house. Luke should get this one. The other elders agree. Kirk whines. Luke thanks the Anonymous Elder. Kirk turns to Luke -- exposing a profile of his chest that seems to defy what we know about human anatomy with its bulging gut and sunken chest -- and offers to render gardening services for Luke's new house. Luke just walks out. Who the hell was that Anonymous Elder? I think it was Lane or Michel wearing a fat suit. It's not like they've had anything else to do in the last few weeks.

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