Gilmore Girls
Die, Jerk

Episode Report Card
Pamie: C | Grade It Now!
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Rory Tries Recapping

Because my recaplet won't be up for very long, I'd like to reprint it here, since it's a good explanation of why I think this recap won't be very long, and why there's no point in dwelling on the ins and outs of this episode like I normally would. I think the point of this episode was to touch briefly on everything we wished we could see, from Lane talking about Dave to Michel to Rory at school, without actually getting anywhere with anyone. So here's the recaplet:

My job in this recaplet is to tell you what happened in this episode. My job this week is easy. Ready? Here's what happened: nothing. Maybe the tertiary characters have taken over the asylum so much that, in order to get everyone a signature line or two, nobody gets a fleshed-out storyline. How much do you think an episode costs these days? In this hour alone we have Luke, Nicole, Lane, MamaLane, Paris, Tana, Janet, Sookie, Bruce, Davey (damn you, Daniel Palladino, and your tendency to have all exciting action happen off-screen. You tease us with Sookie's pregnancy for a year and then rob us of her having a scene where she welcomes her son into the world? Screw all of you for that. Babies are what November sweeps were invented for!), Digger, Emily, Richard, and Michel. To top it off, enter brand-new characters of Personality-less Yale Editor Boy and Angry Ballerina. Don't get attached; I'm sure neither of them will be making another appearance. We sort of get a little bit of an update with Lane and Dave: apparently they're just peachy, which is bullshit, because any eighteen-year-old girl whose boyfriend is on the other side of the country isn't that well-adjusted. She's on the phone, she's crying, she's writing letters, and she's saving every dime to visit him. She talks about him constantly, asking everyone if they think she's doing the right thing by waiting on him. Nicole and Luke? They're fine. Lorelai? Fine. Sookie and her baby? Fan-fucking-tastic. Digger? Aside from five minutes of food discussion, he's pretty much just taking up oxygen, but in an oh-so-cheeky way. You can see the awesome storylines just past everyone's reach, and that's what's so frustrating. This show used to be about relationships -- particularly cross-generational conflicts -- and had touching moments where people grew up a little and learned something. This show used to have romance, and flirting, and the tender heartbreak of vulnerability. Now we've got chatter. Pointless chatter. I miss my show. But if the point of this episode was for Daniel Palladino to tell me that it's okay to vote this episode a C+ with no hard feelings, then point taken. Thanks, Dan, for knowing when I'm just doing my job.

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Gilmore Girls

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