Lorelai arrives at her parents' house and finds it dark and empty, not unlike their very souls. Calling out, she hears Emily answer with a weak "I'm here." Lorelai finds her stretched out on the couch wearing huge black glasses. "Oh, I'm sorry Mrs. Onassis," Lorelai says. "I was looking for my mother." Emily is not amused, and snaps back: "Will you at least promise to keep your comedy set at my funeral to under five minutes?" She dramatically recounts her eye surgery -- the doctor, after finishing with one eye, told her that the new LASIK procedure did not conform to the anatomy of her other eye, so he'd have to revert to the old procedure, something she very much did not want. "Because," Lorelai mock-comforts her, "it's so last year." Lorelai wants to locate the alleged army of servants are that her dad talked about. Emily says that they're all gone, and Lorelai asks to where. "To hell, I hope," Emily says. "One person more incompetent than the rest." I'm pretty sure she means "one person more incompetent than the next," otherwise we'd no doubt now hear a diatribe against this Most Incompetent Person. The nurse was shady, the housekeepers were eating everything, and the errand boys wore pants that hung below their underwear. How she saw any of this is anyone's guess, but she's hilarious, so I don't mind the inconsistency. "And no one was worse than the driver they got me," Emily adds. "Have you ever met the cab drivers in Prague? Well, they would hide their wallets from this man. Plus, I think he had a gun in his pocket." Quietly, Lorelai jokes that maybe the driver was just happy to see her. Good one, Lorelai. Emily swans out a hand, asking to be helped up, and says that she doesn't need all those people, anyway; Lorelai can just take her around for her errands. Lorelai's eyebrows nearly shoot off her head and she scrambles to get out of it, offering to just take the list of things to be done and do them herself. But no, Emily insists that Lorelai will be the driver, and they head out to the driveway.