Christopher starts to explain, but Rory interrupts him, reminding him that she's only asked for one thing in her life, "ever." He says that this wasn't his idea, and that he didn't call Lorelai. Hey, Rory's wearing the same sweater Alterna-me at the next table has on! Rory isn't buying Chris's bullshit this time. She doesn't believe that Lorelai called Christopher. Even if she did invite him to lunch, he shouldn't have said yes. Christopher says that he had no good reason to say no, and that he couldn't rat Rory out. Passing blame is more than just a talent with the people on this show. It's a career. Chris says he didn't know Rory was going to be there, and that it's just as much of a surprise to him as it is to Rory. Immediately, Rory flounces back a sentence starting with "Oh, I see!," asking if it wouldn't have been as bad if she hadn't found out about it. Chris says "no" a few times, and adds, "That is not how it went down." Someone else has been playing Grand Theft Auto. Chris then throws in a "You know what," and Rory tosses in a "fine," and this generic television argument is brought to you by Glarkware. Glarkware: For when you want to put your chocolate in some peanut butter. I don't know. I'm running out of sponsors. Christopher reminds Rory that he was here first, so he's always going to be around, intermittently, without warning or responsibility, at the most inconvenient times, for the rest of their lives. Rory and Christopher are having a shouting match in the Dragonfly, so if they were even thinking about reinstating lunch around here, that's probably now out of the question. Chris says he's not the bad guy. "Hey, if the black hat fits," snits Rory. Chris reminds her that he's her father. Spank her! Rory, again: "Fine."
Lorelai skips back in, telling a very long story about Michel's violating several of the Bathrobe Bandits' rights. Nobody's fired or arrested, but that was after Lorelai had to comp everything and throw in a few free bathrobes. The cops were called. People were chased: "Plus, Michel ripped his pants and his underwear is pink and shiny." Wow. A lot happened in that three minutes she was gone. Stars Hollow has a hell of a space-time continuum. Lorelai asks what's up with the crickets her hilarious story received. Christopher glugs some wine and DUIs his baby out of that place without any briny porkchops. Chris stammers a goodbye to anyone he's ever met and tells Lorelai, right in front of Rory, that he'll call her later. Asshole!