T.J. and Luke are working on those pipes. T.J. says they could survive in the woods together with their teamwork, starting a new civilization. Luke figures they'd need a woman for that, so T.J. decides to bring Liz. But since Luke can't sleep with Liz on account of her being his sister, they'd probably bring Lorelai around. This works out well for T.J., who can genetically mate with either female. Luke asks T.J. if he considers himself a jealous man. T.J. asks if Luke's cutting pipe with some other guy tomorrow. Hello, DIRTY! T.J. says he's not a jealous guy: "Jealousy is bad. Jealousy is what landed me in jail. Twice." Luke asks what T.J. would think if Liz had lunch with an ex. T.J. freaks out, asking which loser Liz just had lunch with. Luke swears she didn't. "Was it Art?" T.J. shouts, grabbing a piece of pipe. He runs off to start some trouble. Someone call the cops.
Emily is on her date, discussing Mahler, the Cleveland Orchestra, and conductor gossip. There's flirting and wine, and good times. Emily and her date decide to stay and have more wine.
Luke drives Lorelai somewhere. Don't try to understand the time frame! Lorelai says that America is great because, if you try hard enough, you can eventually find a screening of St. Elmo's Fire somewhere. Luke says that's why they get the really good seats at the summits. Don't try to figure out how they saw a movie tonight! They just did. It's late. They saw Rob Lowe. Eventually, Luke admits that he didn't like the movie. These two aren't going to make it. Luke says he loves how it got him out of a town meeting, though. They kiss at Lorelai's doorstep. They go all the way to first base. Lorelai asks him to stay. Luke says he's got work in the morning. Whatever, she totally has to wash her hair, anyway. He says he'll make it up to her this weekend. But isn't it Saturday? Gah! More kissing. Strummy, strummy, kiss, kiss. Luke tells Lorelai he's cool with lunch now. "Oh, okay," Lorelai says. "Good." Luke leaves.
Paris has broken her fast and is surrounded in food. It's the kind of meal reserved for Lorelai and Rory on a Friday night. Chinese food and pizza and food and food. Rory somehow doesn't want any. Paris ordered two enormous pizzas. Rory leaves to go to Marty's, as Paris continues to chow down, frustrated that there's no cheesy bread.
Marty and Rory are on Marty's bed, studying Rome. "College is breaking my spirit," he admits. "Every single day telling me things I don't know. It's making me feel stupid." They decide to take a break, since Rory's exhausted. Marty says that living is exhausting. Rory complains that her week totally sucked. By the way, Rory couldn't position her head any further away from Marty. She clearly isn't interested in him. "Why'd it suck?" Marty asks. "Just a ton of schoolwork," she says, adding: "Ramadan." Check out this lie: "I broke up with my boyfriend this week." Every single word in that sentence is a lie! "That was fun. In front of a bunch of people at my grandmother's house." A bunch of people who belittled you in public. Rory then mopes about Christopher, and how her dad just keeps trying to be in her life when she totally doesn't need his broke ass. Marty says that once he found out his dad wasn't really his dad, it made their relationship much better, since all the fatherly pressure had been taken off. Marty shouldn't bother trying to open up to Rory, because when she's not talking about herself, she immediately falls asleep. Just as Marty tries to veer the conversation back to Rory's being single, he notices that she's zonked out in his bed. Get used to it, Marty, because if you do become her boyfriend, it's the loneliest job there is.