MONDO EXTRAS

Assets: She's no longer dating Milo Ventimiglia.

Liabilities: Mumblemouth.

Current approximate level of fame: America Ferrera
Deserved approximate level of fame, post-Gilmore: Amber Tamblyn

Name: Scott Patterson
Age: 48
Occupation: Actor, lug
Non-Gilmore Experience: 6 movies and a solid wad of TV guest spots

Assessment: Scott Patterson started out young and studly -- remember, Elaine thought he was spongeworthy! -- but it's been a while since then. During the early Gilmore days, before Luke turned into kind of a jackhole, it seemed like Patterson was poised to capture that Cute Grumpy Dad slot that might have set him up to play Amanda Bynes's father in some agreeably unimportant trifle. But actually seeing him set to play a dad in Her Best Move, an upcoming family soccer comedy (blech), still seems a little sad. At least he's also in Saw IV, so he's keeping his options open.

Assets: He'd still make a pretty cute grumpy dad.

Liabilities: God help him if the oft-repeated factoid that he founded a soft-rock band with Marc Summers (from Unwrapped, not to mention Double Dare) turns out to be true.

Current approximate level of fame: Enrico Colantoni
Deserved approximate level of fame, post-Gilmore: John Wesley Shipp

Name: Kelly Bishop (b. Carole Bishop)
Age: 63
Occupation: Actor; song-and-dance woman
Non-Gilmore Experience: 13 movies, lots of TV, and -- oh, yeah -- enough Broadway to have picked up a Tony Award

Assessment: Kelly Bishop is awesome, full stop. She first became famous playing wounded, sad Sheila in the Broadway production of A Chorus Line (do you own the original Broadway CD? Yeah, that's her on "Daddy always thought that he married beneath him" and so forth), for which she won a handful of awards, including the Tony. She was also Baby's mom in Dirty Dancing, of course, meaning that she can do Cool Disapproving Mom and Warm Chattering Mom equally well. The answer to the question "What will Kelly Bishop do next?" is pretty simple: she'll do whatever she wants.