It's a beautiful day on the Yale campus, when Lorelai and Chris arrive for Parents' Weekend. Lorelai casts aspersions on the perfectness of it all, saying the grass is too green; the air is too crisp; and the trees too beautiful for it all to be real. "Yale is crafty," she says. "Yale is smart. Yale is Yale, after all." Let me ask y'all something. Is Lauren Graham walking funny? Is she doing it on purpose? Is it all part of the whole "Lorelai is so youngish and quirky and anti-establishment that she walks all jumpity-hoppity, pigeon-toed and non-ladylike even when she's wearing a dress that costs more than my mortgage payment" shtick? I've had enough of that. Her hair, however, looks stunning as always. She joshes around making a joke out of Parents' Weekend, trying to get Chris to join her in writing silly names on their nametags. He, alternatively, is taking it all quite seriously. He says that he thinks he'll stick with his own name. "Senior Boringpants?" Lorelai says, earning a small cheer from me. "Mr. Stick 'N. Themud?" Lorelai reads the Parents' Weekend paper and is alarmed to see the endless number of a capella jams available over the weekend.
Lorelai and Chris get a call from Rory, who is busy at the paper. "Tell her," Chris says, "we're at the L-shaped building that from the top, looks like a Polaroid camera." Rory says that, believe it or not, she is not familiar with all of Yale's buildings from the sky. "Oh, how ignorant of you, honey," Lorelai jokes and turns to Christopher, announcing that Rory doesn't give two figs about Yale architecture. "Not two figs?" Chris says, taking the phone. Rory: "One-and-a-half figs is all I give!" The rest of this scene is literally Rory putting up with her parents' Laurel and Hardy "hilarity" as they blather on about the days' lecture offerings. Seriously, it's so much blathering I can't take it. Lorelai commandeers the phone to get some clarity on this a capella phenomenon and Rory warns her that to avoid it, they must stay away from arches or anywhere else that has good acoustics. "And," she adds, "if you hear a pitchpipe, run." Lorelai says they're going to go have brunch with the Provost. "Or...on the Provost," she says. "It's still unclear."
Back at the pool, Luke is suffering under the close attentions of Coach Bennett. He can't escape before she gives him the high-pressure sale for dinner, and he leaves, saying that he'll call her.