Stac(e)y: I lurve Lorelai's super-cute hat. She goes to Yale and goes to Rory's room and there's boyfriend!Doyle totally making himself at home because he's dating Bossy!Paris, who totally complains that Doyle's putting his wet laundry on her laundry (Dirty!!!1!), and I'm like, "Honey? If that boy put anything wet on me, I'd be grateful!LOL!" So then Lorelai says something REALLY FUNNY because Paris is talking about having s*x with Doyle and ohmigod it was hilarious, you should have seen it.
Rory puts on lipstick and apologizes to her mother for having to hear Doyle and Paris speak. She then has to apologize again immediately for having told Paris about Lorelai and Luke's breakup. Rory tries to make it seem like it wasn't her fault that she told Paris; like there's some kind of truth Roofie in the breakfast cereal's Half & Half. Lorelai tells her not to worry, since she was just handed a flyer in the mall, meaning she was mistaken for a student. Rory points out that, according to the flyer, she was also just mistaken for a sexually-confused Polynesian. Rory stands in front of her Dave Eggers poster. No, the other one. Lorelai thinks it's a good idea, their having dinner together. Rory points out that it is Friday night, after all. Lorelai says it's a huge deal they're not eating with "Eva and Adolf." Rory scolds Lorelai for calling Richard "Aldolf." Lorelai: "No, no. That was Gramma." Heh. Nice one, Lor.
Stac(e)y: What color lipstick was Rory putting on at the beginning of Episode 5-15????? I REALLY need to KNoW!!! OMG, it was SO RUDE calling Emily H1T1er. Do you know how many Jews Hitler killed? Emily hasn't ever killed anyone! I know it was a joke, but some people were actually killed in the Holocost. People should be more SENSITIVE. Esp. Loreleii! She's a Jew!!!
Sara M calls: "Hey, listen, Pam. I really need to tell you something. I think your recaps...they're just not good anymore. You're really not fair to Lorelai anymore. Ever since you got married, your recaps just...they just suck. I'm so happy to get this off my chest. Yeah, just needed to tell you. Okay, I'll hang up now. You suck. I hope you've learned why you're wrong and it's important to be fair to Lorelai, who's a fictional character who doesn't exist and doesn't have feelings. I tune in each week because the promos tell me this'll be the week she decides between the guy with the hat and the guy who's Rory's dad. I think you haven't been fair to her. I just wanted to...I just wanted to let you know that. Love ya. I know it's a weird thing to end a friendship over, but it's important to me. It just outweighs all the nice things you've done for me. Like a scale. Please stop typing. I can hear you typing. I'm not Stacey, okay? I'm disappointed, but I'm not Stacey. I hope you take what I've said tonight to heart and like, really think about it, you know?"