A woman walks in and asks Jess if she can speak with a "Lucas Danes." You know, they could just cut to the next scene with the two of them, since it's already obvious right here what kind of plot device this woman is, and why she's here. She's Taylor's lawyer, and wants Luke to sign the lease agreement. He invites her to sit for a cup of coffee. They chat and flirt. She's very meek, so she'll fit right in here at Stars Hollow's National Organization for Women (If the Men Don't Mind Too Much). The lawyer says that Taylor loves things to be formal, neat, and in triplicate. She sips the coffee and then has an orgasm about how great it is, and tells him his coffee's so big and strong. She even wipes the corner of her mouth after swallowing. The lawyer tries to pay for the coffee, but Luke, the man, won't let her. He wants to pay for it. She offers to let Taylor pay for the coffee, an idea Luke likes very much. She smiles and flirts and smiles and flirts and then leaves. Jess moves in for the kill and begins teasing Luke immediately. "Guess Gloria Allred wants to go slumming," Jess says. Gloria Allred should sue for having her name invoked in this anti-female episode. Jess goes on about how the lawyer was clearly hitting on Luke, laughing at his jokes and such. I have to rewind three times with every line of Jess's because it's hard to understand him sometimes. I think he says, "Didn't you hear her panting when you were signing those things?" Except he says "panting" like "painting." Luke says she's a suit, and so she's not his type. Jess says monks are his type, as he hasn't been on a date in a long time. Luke says he was on a date last month, but it's quickly revealed that all he did was drive a woman home. Jess says he's off to see Rory for a real date. Jess leaves. Luke walks back to the counter and stands still. He looks down at the counter, wishing someone -- anyone -- would shout "cut."
Episode Report Card831 USERS: C+
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