Lane is in full angst on the bed, squinting into the pillow in the dark. Lorelai turns on the light and turns off the music. Lane apologizes. Lorelai says it's okay, but that Rory is stuck in Hartford tonight and won't be coming home. Lane says that she didn't know, and that she'll just go home. Lorelai says that she's not Rory, but that they use the same blow dryer, so Lane could talk to her if she wanted to. Lane says she did something really stupid. She explains the hair-touching. She says she didn't know why she did it. She says she can't ever go back to school: "I'll have to be home schooled. My mother finally gets her way." Lorelai says that Lane's got so many years of screw-ups ahead of her that this is really no big deal. "So not helping!" Lane says. Lorelai says that maybe Lane should be a hairdresser so that she has an excuse to touch nice hair. Lane smiles and asks what she's going to do now that everyone in school is going to be talking about what an idiot she is. Lorelai says that everyone does stupid things in high school. "Not like this!" Lane says. "No, some people get pregnant," Lorelai comments. This is like the bizarro Mary Green here, and I still don't like it. I don't enjoy the mother solving everyone's problems with the "at least you're not sixteen and pregnant" theory. Lorelai says she has a great life and an amazing kid through taking a detour. She asks if Rich's hair felt as good as she thought it would. "Better." Lorelai says that Lane will be fine. Lane asks who Max is. "Rory's teacher," says Lorelai. "Oh. He has nice hair!" says Lane. No, he doesn't, Lane. You're so young.
Mustang Max has made himself at home in the living room with coffee and something to read. Lorelai walks in and sits down. Max is all with the, "So, where were we?" Lorelai says that Lane is going to stay the night because she had a "bad teen day" and needs to "crash somewhere sympathetic." She says that if this wasn't a "major Judy Blume moment" she would have asked Lane to leave. Mustang Max asks where there's a hotel close by. Lorelai says he should just stay the night since everybody else is. She tells him that the couch is comfortable and that it's really bad outside. He says he will stay if it's not a problem. She says it isn't. He asks for a kiss goodnight. Lord, with the lechery. They kiss. Lorelai stands up and feels Mustang Max's hair. He gives her a strange look. Lorelai walks away with the open-mouthed "help me!" face.
Morning. Lorelai is in bed, wearing the Paul Frank monkey thermal top that I have been coveting. ["I have the pyjamas. They rock." -- Wing Chun] She hears the driver arrive with Rory, and gets out of bed. She puts on tennis shoes, grabs a coat and runs to meets Rory at the front door. She blurts out that there's a boy on the couch, but that nothing happened, and he just slept there. Rory walks into the house.