Gilmore Girls
New And Improved Lorelai

Episode Report Card
Al Lowe: B- | 1 USERS: A+
YOU GRADE IT
Not So New, Not Especially Improved

At the diner the next morning, Luke's generosity overflows. When a customer picks up her pancake order and says that she didn't order blueberries, he assures her that "anti-oxidants are on the house today!" Awesome. Man, pancakes. I'm starving now. Everything's coming up roses until Miss Patty and Babette burst in, crushing Luke in a screeching hug. "You finally did it, you dumb sonofabitch," Babette says. "You finally got in there and closed the deal!" The ladies tell him that they are mad they had to find out about the engagement from the notorious Eastside Tillie: "She was spreading it around town like she's gonna be a bridesmaid!" They want to hear about the proposal, and assume Luke got down on one knee or hid the ring in anything, "like a glass of champagne or a cannoli." Heeeee. Please somebody, bring me a cannoli. Luke says that, actually, he's still working on the ring. See how he tries to keep his business to himself? Why does he live in this place? Babette and Miss Patty get excited, saying how, oh, spontaneous proposals are the best, after all. Babette says that Morey proposed to hear spontaneously. "It was a brisk fall night," she says, "and Morey was on top...no, I was on top..." Luke is scandalized. "Wait," Babette continues, "Stoney Morrison was on top." Luke: "Babette!" She "We were playing twister, did I not mention that?" Luke says no, she hadn't. "Oh, I probably should have." Miss Patty and Babette insist that Luke tell them how he proposed, and instead of, like, saying it's private, Luke explains that Lorelai proposed to him. Immediately, the two ladies put on their "bless your heart" faces. "Oh," Miss Patty says, "you went modern." They mumble a few more congratulations before he has to go back to work. "She proposed," Miss Patty says, clearly disappointed. Babette is also no longer as excited: "Yeah, well, thank God he's got a good ass."

Grant Lee Phillips, the Troubadour, is doing some strummy outside about a special, one-time deal on a pre-owned heart. If y'all think I don't love it, you're quite mistaken. I wish he were in every scene. I wish he'd come barreling into one of Richard and Emily's parties wearing a thrift-store sweater vest, menacingly brandishing a guitar. Lorelai strolls past in an outfit that I love (purse, jacket, shirt? Bangin'), and comes face to face with Twickham House, back on the market. She chats with the realtor, who gives her the high-pressure sale, naturally mentioning again how great the house would be for kids. "Not you, too," Lorelai jokes, as her phone rings. It's her father, who has called to update her on all the details of Rory's upcoming court date. He's happy to report that he's retained Charlie Davenport as Rory's attorney. "You remember Charlie, Lorelai," he says. "He bought you a doll for your birthday, once." He announces this like Lorelai's still a child, and like he's not trying to raise her daughter out from under her. He gets pissed when she doesn't seem interested in any of these Rory issues, and asks if she'll be present at the meeting. "Oh, no," Lorelai answers, "it sounds like you have everything under control." Richard huffs and says that, fine, he'll talk to her later. Lorelai: "Tell Charlie 'thanks for the doll' for me."

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Gilmore Girls

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