Gilmore Girls
One's Got Class And The Other One Dyes

Episode Report Card
Pamie: C | 1 USERS: A+
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Lane has moved into full-on Paris mode as she tells Dave that he's got to get into leader mode and calm his band. She says they're being insubordinate. She suggests a number of ways he could torture the band into doing what she wants, but she's talking so quickly at this point that I've listened twice and still can't tell what she says after "strung up." Dave says that his band is a democracy. Paris...I mean, "Lane" says, "Democracy's overrated. Now get in there and kick some butts!" Lane offers to fix Brian's deviated septum by ramming one of her drumsticks up his nose. Dave asks Lane if she really thinks this is working. "No, it's not working," she says. "We sound like a bunch of wankers." From snogging to wanking, I think perhaps the Palladinos spent their summer abroad. Dave asks Lane if she'd like to be able to actually hit her drums with her drumsticks. Lane says she doesn't want to leave the band. Dave practically starts crying, telling Lane that she can't leave the band and that they need her. Then maybe they could suck it up and play quietly, or find a different time to rehearse where they're allowed to make some noise? Why move the band to a place that Lane can't practice if she's so vital, Dave? Apparently it's no longer cold in Connecticut in October, because Lane's wearing a pretty small t-shirt at night by some pumpkins. Dave's a little lispy. He tells Lane there's no way she's going to become their Pete Best. Lane tells Dave to go back in, and that she'll join him in a second. She needs this time to hold her drumsticks and look off longingly as the "cricket" sound effect is played as loudly as Brian's deviated septum.

Lane's inside her super-secret closet space, asking Rory to help her with her dilemma. Rory calls it a "pickle," but Lane insists that it's much larger than a pickle. Not only does Lane need to figure out a way to leave the house unaccounted for three times a week, but she has no car to drive to Hartford, no license to operate a vehicle, and no drums that she owns that she's allowed to transport to Hartford to play. Then they decide to have a little argument over Cornershop and Coltrane, and which one would be more distracting. You know what's distracting? A music argument every three minutes. Rory suggests that Lane tell MamaLane the truth, and promise to keep her schoolwork pristine. Lane says that her mom would start waving a crucifix at her. Rory says that Lane doesn't have that many more options. There's a noise like someone's pressing the number two button, but Rory's calling that "call waiting." Hasn't call waiting been the same sound for over ten years? Doesn't any Foley artist in town know how to duplicate that sound? Why do we keep getting fake call waiting noises in movies and television? I'm gonna form a committee. They stop the hanging-up process so Lane can remind Rory that she really does like Cornershop. Thanks for that.

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Gilmore Girls




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