"I don't care about wallpaper!" Luke says. "Well," Lorelai asks, still hysterical, "do you care about ME?" He tries to interrupt her to say yes, but it's all pouring out of Lorelai now: "I'm going CRAZY here. I made a commitment to you and I need to make it happen." Luke half-heartedly says that it will, but he has April to consider. Lorelai and I call bullshit, together. Lorelai says that once they're married the April thing will be fine. "Anna said so," she says. Luke gets the super-concerned look, and says that Lorelai wasn't supposed to talk to Anna. She starts to apologize, and then (mentally) says fuck it. "God, no," she says, throwing up her hands. "I'm not going to defend myself." She says that she's been skulking around for months not saying anything and not having an opinion on anything, "like I'm Clarence Thomas, or something!" She sputters that she's done with all of that and does not want to wait anymore. If only I could find words to describe her pitch-perfect portrayal of this kind of hysteria. Why can't he just fucking understand her? I feel my blood pressure rising every time he tries to say something, which he does now, again blabbing that he has April to consider. "You're going to have to figure out," she says, "how April fits into our lives and not the other way around!" Luke says that he's trying. "Well," she answers, "try married." He gets snappy now, saying that she needs to just wait. "No!" she yells, "I'm not waiting! It's now, or never!" Luke makes the grievous error of not grabbing her, throwing her into the car, and driving her wherever she wants to go -- instead, he says that he doesn't like ultimatums. "I don't like Mondays," Lorelai retorts, "but unfortunately they come around eventually." Scott Patterson, who is holding onto this scene for dear LIFE while Lauren Graham absolutely tears it apart, says that he can't just jump like this. "Well," she says, "I'm sorry to hear that. And, I have to go." She walks away, as yet another troubadour -- this time, the very moving Sam Phillips -- sings that "the places I go are never there."
Episode Report CardAl Lowe: B+ | 452 USERS: C
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