Emily hears the doorbell ring and goes to answer it, yelling at the maid: "Gertie, you're half my age. Why do I always beat you to the door?" It's Lorelai. Emily lowers her voice conspiratorially and asks how things are with Luke. Lorelai lies, saying things are fine, though it should be obvious that things are decidedly not fine, and says she could use a drink. They overhear Rory in the drawing room, talking to Finn on her cell phone: "Get him out of there about 9:30. I trust you, Finn." She pauses, and then tells him that no, she's not surprised he hasn't heard many people say they trust him. "Just get Colin and get [Logan] out of there," she says, and hangs up as her mom and grandmother come in (it doesn't get past me that Lorelai and Rory are both wearing gorgeous black and blue dresses). Lorelai sees a covered display on the coffee table and asks what it is. "They slapped my hand earlier," Rory says, and The G-Unit tell them it's a secret. "Oh, my God," Lorelai jokes. "It's the weapons of mass destruction! Get the President on the phone!" Richard rolls his eyes, trying to get her to be serious, but she continues. "If he's not in the Oval Office," she says, "try the Ice Cream Room!" Heeeeee. Sadly, it's not WMD. It's something far more stupid -- an architectural model of the building the elder Gilmores want to have dedicated to Rory. Richard makes a sweeping gesture and proudly unveils the building -- much to Lorelai's glee and Rory's horror. The placard that reads "The Rory Gilmore Astronomy Building" takes up almost half the face of the building. "Is this actual lettering?" Rory asks. "I mean, is this to scale? Because the lettering would be thirty feet high." Lorelai laughs: "Well, honey, it's the astronomy building. You have to be able to see it from space."
The Gilmores are interrupted from this alarming discussion by Christopher, who has arrived for dinner at The Grandparents' invitation. Lorelai and Rory are very surprised to see him, but Emily says that they had promised Chris a home-cooked meal before they left for Europe and had to make good on their promise. "You can call a Gilmore many things," Richard says, "but you can't call him a welsher." Lorelai: "What other things can you call him? Just for future reference?" Christopher asks what's up with the building model and kids Rory about it. "Dad," she says, "you can take my seat, because I have to go...legally change my name and transfer to Brown." Lorelai laughs, saying that they've teased Rory way worse than this before. "Remember when you were ten," Lorelai asks, "and you thought you discovered U2?" Aww. That's cute. Rory says that she really does have to go because of Logan, and Emily walks her out.
Emily returns with yet another guest, who just happened to be at the door. Lynnie (played by Melora Hardin, is introduced to everyone, and Emily begins an absolute campaign about her, as Lorelai and Christopher look on, confused. I like Melora Hardin, but her dress and hair are wretched. Emily makes Lorelai move and sit by her, so Lynnie -- a professional psychiologist -- can sit by Chris. Lorelai pouts and says stupid, teenagery stuff, as Emily and Richard sing Lynnie's praises, to the high heavens. It is now painfully aware that this is a setup for Christopher's sake, and Lorelai could not be more amused. They all laugh overly loudly at everything Lynnie says, and I am about to sit in judgment of it all, until I am painfully reminded that I, yours truly Al Lowe, will be orchestrating a similar hookup over Memorial Day weekend between a friend of mine and a friend of my husband. What was I thinking? My friend Jules is searingly hot -- but a notoriously hard nut to crack -- and here I am putting another innocent man in her path? I hope my husband and I can handle it better than Emily and Richard, who cannot shut up to save their lives. "Christopher, you should meet Lynnie's mother. She's a stitch," Emily says. "Isn't she a stitch, Richard?" Richard: "She's an entire seam, Emily!" Love, love, love the geezer Gilmores tonight. Lorelai gets more and more smirky, as her mother continues to list Lynnie's virtues.