Gilmore Girls
Red Light On A Wedding Night

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Run, Max! Run!

Fully clothed, Max and Lorelai are next to each other in bed. These two haven't seen each other in months, and there's no sex at all? Clearly this wedding is over. Max is asleep and Lorelai's wide awake, staring at the ceiling.

Lorelai's in Rory's room, waking her up. Lorelai asks Rory what she's doing. "Taking back Poland," Rory smiles as she rolls up from her pillow. Lorelai tells Rory that she has a boy in her room. Rory says that it's Max, and that Lorelai likes Max. Lorelai says it's weird and that she's never had a man in her room like this. Rory tells Lorelai she just has to adjust, like the time she got the green stripes in her hair. Lorelai points out that she hated the green stripes in her hair. Rory says she's too tired to come up with good analogies. Lorelai tells Rory to wake up, and gets in bed beside her. Rory sits up. Lorelai wants to talk about how Rory feels having Max in the house. Rory says she's fine because she likes Max. Lorelai says that once she's married, nothing will ever be the same again. Rory says that she knows. Lorelai says they can't be just the two of them in their special secret clubhouse with no boys allowed. I don't see why, since they did it tonight with him trapped on the couch behind them. Lorelai says their lives will be over. Rory says they aren't dying. Lorelai agrees that they aren't dying, but insists that their lives as they know them are going to morph into a mutation that neither of them can conceive. Rory asks whether Lorelai's talking about giant ants. Lorelai says that, metaphorically, she is speaking about giant ants. Rory's not worried about getting attacked by giant ants, since Max is there. Lorelai and Rory both lie back in the bed. Lorelai tells Rory she can't walk around naked anymore. Rory says she doesn't remember ever doing that. Lorelai says that Rory did walk around naked. Rory asks whether she was three. Lorelai says that perhaps Rory was. Rory asks whether Max hogs the bed. Lorelai says that he's a very "stay-on-his- side-of-the-bed kind of guy." Poor Max. She says that he's cute and he wears pajama bottoms. Rory orders Lorelai to stop talking. Lorelai says that the bottoms aren't funny, which she hates. She hates funny bottoms. Rory asks Lorelai whether she's happy. Lorelai says she is. Rory concludes that Lorelai will be fine and that she'll get used to having Max around. Rory tells Lorelai that she's falling asleep and needs to be a big girl and go back to her room. Lorelai asks for ten more minutes, gets it, and then sleeps in her daughter's room all night long instead of with her fiancé. How is this not a problem in the morning? Max! Run!

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Gilmore Girls

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