Luke and Lorelai are interrupted by the wails of Kirk. Lorelai says that they need to take him upstairs. "Lulu can't see me like this," saysKirk . Lorelai tries to argue her side, but Kirk screams, "Lulu can't see me like this!" loud enough that Lulu must have heard. Lorelai asks if she can take a look. Kirk says she can't. Lorelai confesses that she doesn't want to take a look. Neither does Luke.
Enter Sookie, who calls this a party. (Poor Sook must not be invited to too many parties.) Lorelai calls her Squiggy, and says she's got good timing. They make Sookie look at Kirk's butt, since she's a chef and a mom and looks at butts full-time these days, unlike Lorelai, who doesn't look at her daughter's butt anymore, now that it's gotten so big. You'd think I was making that up, but I'm not. Sookie immediately assesses the ass and declares it a state of emergency. Lorelai leaves for first aid. Sookie asks Kirk how he's feeling. Kirk apologizes to Luke for biting him. "They were after me," he says. Sookie asks who was chasing him. Luke explains that Kirk thinks assassins were chasing him. I've typed the word "ass" a lot in this paragraph. Kirk says they were under his bed in his room, so they chased him, down the hall, down the stairs, past Luke and Lorelai kissing, through the yard, over that fence. Sookie tells him the assassins are gone now. Kirk asks if he imagined both the assassins and Luke kissing Lorelai. Sookie laughs and says she's pretty sure he imagined both. Kirk says they looked so real. Sookie sees Luke give a guilty grin to his shoes. She pushes Luke into the foyer, telling Kirk to take it easy.
In the foyer, Sookie can barely contain her excitement over the joining of Luke and Lorelai's mouths. She slaps him, pushes him, beats him, and hugs him, asking why Lorelai hadn't told her yet; in the same breath, she tells him how wonderful it all is. They hug. Sookie says she can't wait to tell Lorelai how wonderful it all is. Luke asks her not to say anything, as he's not sure how Lorelai feels about it all just yet. "Call me Belinda," Sookie says, "'cause my lips are sealed!" She tells Luke that this is good, and walks away. Luke thinks for a bit before telling the air, "I hope so."
CuteDean's house. There's a tray for his keys. It rests next to the gigantic wedding photo of CuteDean and Lindsay that looks like it was done at a prom sponsored by Sears. "Hey," Lindsay says, waiting up at the table like the jilted wife she is. "Hey," CuteDean says back. Lindsay smiles and says her mom brought by brownies. CuteDean goes straight to the fridge. "You worked late again," Lindsay says. We are in 1967, aren't we? Wasn't this a scene in The Wonder Years? Lindsay asks CuteDean if he has to work tomorrow. CuteDean says he works at Doose's tomorrow. Lindsay asks if he'll be home for dinner, since she was thinking of "cookin' or somethin'." CuteDean fixes himself something non-alcoholic and goes, "I guess. I'll try. I don't know." Lindsay asks CuteDean if he wants a brownie. Not with his orange juice, he doesn't. And I can't blame him. The first time I ever got sick drinking alcohol, which was coincidentally the first time I ever got drunk, I was drinking Fuzzy Navels while eating brownies. Y'all, that's the nastiest-looking puke you've ever seen. Lindsay says her mom put Gummi Bears in the brownies, like she's still three. Perhaps it's because Lindsay talks like she's still three, and is wearing jammies.