Jess comes out and says smarmy things with his smarmy, asshole eyebrows. Man, I'm tired of the sound of his voice and all the stupid things they make him say. ["Lady, get in line. It's a long line." -- Wing Chun] Lorelai and Rory have to ask Jess about eighty times to give them a minute to finish talking, but he's not done making "funny" "quips" and "verbal" "jabs." I'm so done with Jess. I'm so done I'd be willing to skip the last two or three episodes if it means we won't see him again until season three. ["No, no deal! Never! We must never see him again, ever, never, never, NEVER! -- Wing Chun] Done with him, I am. Rory promises to be home early. Lorelai kisses her goodbye and says goodbye to Jess. Instead of saying goodbye, the little shit just says, "Ma'am." You know, I really want my mom to watch this show, but I can't do it until they get rid of Jess or there's a non-Jess episode. Because he will make my mother hate this show before she even gives it a chance. Jess doesn't have his books, so they can't study. It's just a ploy to get Rory to come up to his room. It's not working, so Jess does a magic act. There's nothing like a random magic act to prove that the guy you're with is a complete tool.
Later, Jess is still doing magic tricks. Give it a rest, Blackstone. Unless you can make yourself disappear. ["Or bury yourself alive. Or set yourself on fire. Or cut yourself in half." -- Wing Chun] Jess is not answering any of Rory's school-centered questions. Instead, he asks where CuteDean is tonight. Flirting, flirting, flirting. It all bores me. It's the same conversation over and over again with these two. He makes her feel guilty about her boyfriend; she tries to talk about something else. She tells him that CuteDean's out of town, which she shouldn't have done. Jess tries to get her to talk about Please Kill Me, the oral history of the punk movement. Rory flirts and says she'll leave if Jess doesn't start paying attention. She says she'd like to borrow Please Kill Me. Strummy music starts as Jess watches Rory and gives a self-satisfied smile.
Even later. It appears that Rory and Jess have eaten a pie together. Instead of studying, Jess has taken to writing down Clash lyrics and making Rory guess the song. Leave, Rory. You aren't getting paid to babysit. In fact, you're not getting paid at all, as far as we can tell, so either neck with the boy or go home. Rory asks why Jess agreed to be tutored. Jess says that Luke said he had to. Rory says that Jess doesn't do what anybody ever tells him to. Jess asks if she'd like to get out of there. He's tired of studying. Rory says he hasn't done any studying yet. She says that all he's done is perform some magic tricks, make coffee, and explain how Coldplay could be considered an alternative band. I don't buy for a second that Jess would believe that, anyway. Jess sees Rory's car and asks if they can get some ice cream. He says that if they go out for ice cream, he'll study when they get back. Rory says there's ice cream there at the diner. Jess says they don't have any cones, and that cones are the most important part of the ice cream. Rory agrees, flirtatiously. She gives him the keys and says she'll read Othello to him as he drives. Rory has never been dumber in her life.