Town meeting. Kirk has brought Lulu, whom he refers to loudly and proudly as "My Girlfriend." He says it about three times before they even take their seats. Through Babette and Andrew, we learn that Taylor has called an emergency meeting, and that's why everyone's there, but that no one knows what the meeting is about. "He said nothing to me or my girlfriend," Kirk notes. Miss Patty says she can't remember the last emergency meeting. Kirk and his girlfriend can't either.
Meanwhile, Rory and Lorelai are mocking Sookie's home birth. "I wanted to be supportive but throw up at the same time," Lorelai says. They want to puke on that plastic sheet, too, and compare it to the Afterschool Special about bedwetting: It's Not Benny's Fault. Lane enters, beaming. Kirk tells her there's a seat behind his girlfriend. Lane takes a seat next to Rory and tells her she's found the most amazing guitarist, a phenom, who was really cool on the phone. She's trying not to get her hopes up for when she meets him tomorrow, but he's the most promising guitarist they've heard from yet. But she has already planned out what their Spin cover will look like. Rory notices that the woman at the front of the room ("Mrs. Van Uppity") is staring at her. "Maybe you're just her type," Lorelai smiles.
Taylor calls the meeting to order. He explains that, every year, one town in Connecticut hosts The Festival of Living Pictures, a show which recreates famous works of art onstage, with real people posing as the figures in the art. Stars Hollow last hosted it seven years ago, and it was a success. "My girlfriend's gonna love this," Kirk lets us know. Woodbury was supposed to host it this year, but had to cancel due to flooding, and Taylor offered up Stars Hollow. Everybody's stoked. "You finally did something right!" Miss Patty says. Taylor's offended, so Miss Patty adds, "Your beard is so sexy." Taylor tells everyone that they only have one week, and per tradition, they also have to come up with one original recreation to add to the traditional ones done every year. If they're the same works every year no matter what city, how close could the recreations look from town to town? Or does every town have someone who looks like Lorelai, someone who looks like Kirk, someone who's a dead ringer for Rory...? Taylor says he's assured Hank, "the Taylor Doose of Woodbury," that they'd take over the festival successfully. "It's a challenge, people, but doable," he says. Taylor introduces Mrs. Van Uppity, who actually has the unfortunate God-given name Buff Otis. She's the head of the Connecticut Arts Council. She takes the podium as Lorelai calls her Rory's future wife. Buff approaches the mic and only says, "Your enthusiasm...shocks me." Hee. Give Buff an Oscar. Lane and Rory debate whether that's a positive statement or not. "Scary broad," Babette warbles to Andrew. Taylor says he'll manage and emcee, Miss Patty will be the stage manager, and Lorelai will be in charge of costumes. Not that anyone's got a job. "I'm here for you and your sexy beard, Taylor," Lorelai says. Taylor giggles and grabs his chin. He says that everyone should sign up if they want to be considered for casting, and that he'll decide with Buff who gets which part. Babette asks Lorelai if she'll be the girl in the Renoir painting again. Lorelai says she's sure she can be persuaded. Taylor says that they should do this and do it well. He adjourns the meeting to positive applause. Rory starts to leave, but Lorelai holds her down, saying she wants to see if Buff asks Rory out.