Anyway, Janet glued Paris's glue gun shut. Rory says that "this war" is getting out of hand. I guess it's a war, but whatever. Whoa. Okay, confusing. Rory says that this morning Paris turned off her alarm and made her almost miss breakfast. But we already know that happened on Tuesday, and if it's Tuesday, then Rory's class would be a Tuesday-Thursday class, which makes sense, but Trevor said he'd see her next week and asked what she was doing this weekend, so unless Trevor's planning on skipping this Thursday, or...dammit! Rory retells the story of running into Marty, but Lorelai prefers to call him "Naked Guy." Lorelai asks if Naked Guy is hot. Rory has to answer this question while walking, and says that he's just Marty, and it's not like that with him. "He's sweet." Lorelai gets it: "Ah. 'Sweet' means bad butt." Rory protests. But "sweet" can also mean "extremely unfunny" or "wears shirts unironically" or "crazy nose hair." Rory hands Lorelai a plate, and says that she's just met Marty, so there's no reason to obsess over him.
Rory grabs bottles of water as Lorelai asks if there are any other guys on the horizon. Rory says there aren't. Lorelai hopes that Rory dates a nice older professor. Yikes, ew and wha? As they walk back to the living room, Rory confesses that Trevor did ask her out for this weekend. She tells Lorelai that she told Trevor that she was busy, not because she doesn't like him ("he's smart and he takes my side in the debates and he's decent to look at" -- well, why don't you just marry him, then?), but he carries a water bottle and Rory thinks that's weird. "Right, hydration," Lorelai says. "Very creepy." Rory complains about him being preppy. And she somehow knows he's studying at Barcelona next year. "So it's a waste of time; it's not going anywhere." Lorelai says it could go to dinner or a movie. Lorelai says that Rory's never really dated. Rory scoffs at the notion, saying she's dated. Lorelai points out that Rory's only had two relationships -- Dean and Jess. I'd like to mention Ryan Phillliipppe here as well, as I think that he counts. And Jess wasn't a relationship; it was a spin-off device. Rory turns the tables and says that Lorelai's never really dated either. I do believe that we've watched Lorelai make mistake after mistake this season while we waited around for something to happen with Luke or Max or whomever. There was the guy from her business school, and Rune, and Alex. Rory says that Lorelai didn't date anyone for seventeen years after having a baby (which makes me profoundly sad, and I don't buy it for a second). Rory says that Lorelai had a second relationship with Christopher, which isn't really true, unless it doesn't bother Rory that Christopher was having two relationships at once. Lorelai says that even if she's not the world's best dater, Rory owes it to herself to give it a shot. She says that there's nothing else to do in college other than date. Rory excuses herself to wash her clothes. "Was that it?" Lorelai asks the empty room. "Is this conversation over? Sorry, did I win?" All questions I'm wondering as well as we fade to commercial.