Gilmore Girls
The Incredible Shrinking Lorelais

Episode Report Card
Pamie: B+ | Grade It Now!
Math Is Hard

Rory is at the Dragonfly, but can't find her mother. She finds CuteDean instead. She's so frantic that CuteDean asks her what's wrong. She says she's fine, but babbles into craziness. CuteDean takes her outside. Rory begins to fake-cry as CuteDean pulls her to the ground and asks her to talk. Rory is very bad at the fake cry. I don't even know why you'd bother doing it if it's going to be so fake. Rory says that she's a failure and that everything is falling apart. She thought she had it under control but she doesn't. Everybody can handle the classes, but she can't, and she's supposed to take five classes since Richard did. She doesn't know how to tell Richard she failed. She didn't even get a chance to fail; she dropped a class. It's a really big deal because she's not a drop-a-class person. She gets good grades and handles things. Lane's not around anymore and she misses her. She liked having Lane at school. She hasn't talked to her mom and she needs to talk to her and she's not around. Rory whines that she's failing and she can't handle it. CuteDean holds her as she says she's messing everything up. She then says that CuteDean shouldn't have to be nice to he, since she was horrible to him, and now he's married to someone nice. Side note: remember how the radio promos for this episode make it sound like Rory throws herself at Dean, and Dean gently tells Rory that she doesn't love him? I want that episode. CuteDean tells Rory she's not a failure. Rory dissolves into words like "can't" and "Mom" and "failure" and "I don't know what to do." I'm so there with you, Rory. CuteDean holds Rory as she cries, and tells her it's okay.

Lorelai finds snazzy Luke as he's on his way to his truck. She should tell him he looks awesome; she doesn't. She apologizes and says she needs to reschedule dinner. Luke says that's fine. Lorelai says she's tired, and apologizes for getting him all dressed up. Luke says it's okay to dress up every once in a while because it reminds him why he's not an accountant. He asks Lorelai if she's okay, because she doesn't look okay. Lorelai distractedly admits that she's distracted. She says that today she wished she was married, even though she loves her life and space and stuff and time, but today she wished she had a partner -- someone to pick up the slack. Someone to make her coffee in the morning and get the sink. Lorelai sits down and cries, saying she thought she had everything under control but that she doesn't, and the inn is falling apart. This has been her dream forever and it's here and she's failing. She can't handle it. She spends every minute running around, working, and thinking. Sookie has the baby and Michel has Céline and she doesn't have time for herself or to talk to Rory. She sat at her parents' house today listening to her grandmother call her a charity case and she couldn't even argue with her. She couldn't say anything because she's running out of money and doesn't know what to do about it and was going to ask Luke for $30,000 tonight: "That's how pathetic I am." Luke tries to figure out how he can give her the money, but Lorelai doesn't want to talk about it right now. She says she doesn't want to think about it. Lorelai cries, and Luke pulls her into his arms as Lorelai whines that she's failing. "I'm failing," she repeats. Luke tells her she's not failing. "I don't know what to do," Lorelai sobs. Luke holds Lorelai as she cries, and tells her it's okay. Ah, fake boyfriends. What would we do without them?

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Gilmore Girls




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