Rory tells Jess she knows it's him on the phone, so she decides to have a little rant, wrapping up two years of tedium. She says he didn't handle things right at all. He could have talked to her or told her he wasn't going to graduate and that his dad was there. So he didn't take her to prom or come to her graduation and left without telling her. Rory says that's fine and she can understand it, but it's over. Oh, really, Rory? Now it's over? Were you still his girlfriend five minutes ago? Rory says she's leaving for Europe tomorrow and going to Yale and she's not looking back. She won't pine for him. "I think...I think I may have loved you but I...I just need to let it go." Yeah. Then she actually says, "So...that's it! I guess. Um. I hope you're good. I want you to be good. And um, okay, so goodbye. That word sounds really lame and stupid now but there it is. Goodbye." That girl has learned absolutely nothing, and if Jess had said a word just then she'd be flying to Venice, California with her backpack instead of to the Venice in Italy.
Jess, emotionless, hangs up the phone and walks away from my direction. There is much rejoicing. Yay.
Lorelai finds Rory and asks if she's okay. Lorelai pulls Rory deep into Chilton for one more stop.
Luke's diner. Lorelai walks in and says that Rory's out in the car. Luke says it was a nice ceremony; Lorelai agrees. She says she needs to say something in case they don't see each other before he goes on his trip: "Don't get engaged." Luke asks why, but Lorelai just walks out of the diner...
...and then Luke wakes up. He leans forward and sighs. Dude, Luke. It's like, 5:30 in the afternoon. You work too hard.
Lorelai pulls Rory through the empty halls of Chilton. Rory is protesting. Why did they bother making her that dress when she's still wearing her gown over it? I had to take my gown off the second I graduated -- we rented them and the company was right there to check off our names so we didn't steal them. Speaking of crimes, Lorelai wants Rory to carve their (THEIR!) initials into the halls of Chilton. Lorelai doesn't have a knife, so she finds a safety pin. She's looking for a good spot to leave a permanent mark of Rory's years in Chilton. Rory doesn't want to do this, mostly because she knows our forum wouldn't stop being outraged about it until October. Every place that Lorelai suggests, Rory tells her the history -- the marble is over 200 years old and Harriet Beecher Stowe walked on it; the banister was donated by Robert Frost; the sconce was lit for the first time by Thomas Edison. Rory says Lorelai could carve their initials very tiny on the baseboard in reverse so nobody figures out it was them. Lorelai says it's probably not such a good idea after all. Sookie is suddenly at the top of some stairs, asking if they're coming, since there's a party back at their place. Rory asks if Lorelai's really throwing a party; Lorelai says it's just a few people. Stars Hollow doesn't throw a gala event to celebrate their queen? Amazing! Lorelai tells Rory to look around for a second. "Notice?" Rory: "Notice what?" Lorelai: "It's not so scary anymore." Rory: "No. It's not." The strummy-strummy takes us out, and there's nothing new until the fall. Sorry. If you wanted a real cliffhanger, go watch The West Wing. This show concluded like Dawson kissing Buffy goodnight.