Gilmore Girls
To Whom It May Concern

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Box Of Letters

Back at the courthouse, Anna's and Luke's attorneys are going at it, law-talkin'-style. "Why don't we ask my client to allow the bus driver, to have custody of her child?" Anna's lawyer jibes, stating that April sees the driver just as much as she sees Luke. When Luke takes issue with all this maligning and interrupts to point out that he is a responsible parent, the judge has to tell both Luke and Anna to shut up and let their lawyers handle the talking.

Sookie is having trouble articulating her own issues as she stomps down the street in Stars Hollow: "I just! And, he didn't! And...I can't believe he could've!" "You know," Lorelai reminds her, "you can't walk off a pregnancy." Sookie rants on: Jackson said he would get a vasectomy, and she believed him. What was she supposed to do, go with him to the procedure and hold his hand? "I had just delivered his baby!" she screams. "It's too much! I don't have the time to baby a grown man! What am I supposed to do? Watch him brush his teeth? Does he want me to cut up his meat?" Lorelai gets in a good one: "I don't think he wants his meat cut at all." Ha! Sookie, however, doesn't appreciate the joke. She's too busy thinking about the four thousand diapers she was counting down until Martha was potty-trained and she didn't have to change any more. Lorelai attempts to soothe her, but it doesn't work. "There was a light at the end of the tunnel," says Sookie. Lorelai: "Babies are more than diapers, right?" Sookie: "No. No! All I remember is 'eat, sleep, poop.'" Lorelai insists that there's other, better stuff: "For one thing, they're pretty cute!" Sookie rightly points out that "cute" is not going to help her sleep through the night. Lorelai rolls out the "Babies are great!" campaign, reminding Sookie of all the fun stuff: first baths, first smiles, the sweet baby smell, etc. "I know what you're doing," says Sookie. "You're trying to make this sound good. I'm hormonal, and you're playing dirty." Lorelai again sort of dreamily says that there are a lot of good things about babies. Sookie gets suspicious: "Are you talking memory, or are you thinking ahead?" Lorelai says it may be a little of both: the subject has come up, she says, but no decisions have been made. Sookie sighs and smiles, suddenly excited: "Oh my God, I'm gonna have another baby." "Yes," Lorelai assures her, "and I will be there to help you, no muffin tops required."

Paris and Rory are enjoying Yale's cafeteria fare, discussing the schedule Paris has laid out for their future. Paris says that they have eight free days on the chart which they should probably fill with volunteer work: "I'm not crazy about wheeling around elderlies in their revealing bathrobes, so I'm thinking about tree planting." She continues to badger Rory about her assignments on the chart, asking if she's written her poem for the Iowa Poetry Prize. Rory points out that this might be a little far-fetched, seeing as how she only took one poetry class sophomore year. Here, let me write it for you: "I gave it up for a Birkin Bag/ My boyfriend sometimes acts like a jag/ My grandmother can be a hag/ I enjoy the works of Susan Sontag." Huh? HUH? Give it up, people! That's why they pay me the millions. Paris says that Hannah Freeman is applying for a Fulbright to study space travel in Nuremburg: "Do you think she's ever traveled to space? It takes twenty minutes to write a poem; two if it's haiku." Hee. She's right, you know. Boom: "This show used to be/ one of the best on TV/ now, um, not so much."

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Gilmore Girls

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