Oh, and I got married. Yep. I'm a wife. And it was really, really, really fun. I highly recommend it.
Lorelai's on the phone, trying to convince someone not to cancel his reservation. Snow, snow, snow. Magic, magic, magic. Lorelai agrees that driving in the snow is tricky, and says she hopes they'll reschedule. She pouts through the lobby and slips on the floor right in front of the door, where Michel emerges holding a shovel. Lorelai says she's desperate for the mats. Michel says he can't get them mats when she's asked him to shovel snow. Maybe someone might put down a towel or a rug or something so that nobody dies. Michel complains that all the snow-digging (the opposite of Lorelai's snow-digging) has caused a crick in his neck, which will cramp his kissing style on his date tonight. Michel explains that he is light-boned and cannot take too much physical labor (Dirty!). Lorelai "excuses" him from shoveling duty (Dirty!), and tells him to focus on the mats instead. Pick up a phone, Lorelai. Michel says that the Goldfarbs are missing after the cross-country skiing expedition Lorelai put them on this morning. Lorelai is now filling her coffee cup with all the leftover coffee from everyone else's mugs. That's an Ew, but also, how long do dirty breakfast dishes and plates hang around in their dining room? Michel just said it's past noon. Lorelai tells Michel to keep calling the Golfarbs' cell phone until he finds them. Should this be before or after he calls about the mats? Sookie calls Lorelai out on the gross thing she's about to do. Lorelai denies it. Lorelai practically breaks into tears and whines that if she doesn't get coffee soon, things are going to get ugly. Sookie says she's ashamed of Lorelai. "I'm ashamed of me, too," Lorelai says quietly. It's a great line reading. Lorelai says she has to get out. Michel reminds her that the driveway is still blocked. Lorelai says she'll walk, somehow, even though she can't because the Goldfarbs have the skis, and she's going to find coffee. Michel tells her to be careful of the floor. Cue the off-camera pratfall.
Emily knocks on the poolhouse door. Richard answers. Emily says she was wondering if everything was okay, since she saw his car parked in the driveway. Richard explains that he took the morning off, as he's still hanging out with Dog: "She's been fairly calm." Emily asks if it's a she. Richard says he ascertained that. He found out the breed as well. He points Emily to dogbreed411.com. (Not a real website; don't waste your time. Not that I did. Shut up.) Emily finds the internet to be "amazing" and "clever," but she's somehow never even touched a mouse. Anyway, Richard guides her to a Louis Vuitton website, and the next thing you know Emily's getting banned from our forum.