Gilmore Girls
You Jump, I Jump, Jack

Episode Report Card
Pamie: C | 1 USERS: A+
YOU GRADE IT
Being An Asshole Is Really Expensive

Emily returns, promising that dinner will be as good as it smells. She tells Luke that it's nice to have a gentleman in the house. "So?" she starts in. "You're recently divorced?" Lorelai stays quiet and smiles into her martini, happy to watch Luke squirm this one out. He says it's not really all that recent. Emily says that if it was in the last year, that's pretty recent. Emily comments that the divorce rate is just terrible these days: "Sure it was inevitable in your case." People in glass poolhouses shouldn't throw stones. Emily says that people get married for fun these days: "Apparently there's nothing good on T.V." Luke catches a glance to Lorelai, who smiles back quietly.

Yale. Rory checks her messages, flipping back her hair (one drink). It's Dean, breaking a date because he has to work more jobs than Kirk. Rory finds a note outside her window as Dean says the word "window." Rory has some really dorky wall art. The note reads: "Be in your vestibule at four tomorrow. Blindfolded. The LDB." As Dean's message comes to a close (I wasn't listening to it either), Rory finds a blindfold in the envelope.

Emily's. The woman is on a roll, discussing how filthy diners can be, and how some even serve roadkill. She's sure that Luke wouldn't participate in such filthy practices, but you know, she just can't leave it alone. Luke is now sufficiently beaten down and is failing at holding his own against Emily, who is now so rude that there's no reason why Luke wouldn't have stormed out of that room by now. Emily: "Would you like another beer, Luke?"

Luke and Lorelai are finally making their escape as Emily calls baseball an "opiate of the masses." Emily follows them out the front and immediately complains that a worker left his filthy truck in the front yard. Luke tells her that it's actually his truck, and Emily mutters some kind of fake compliment: "Rustic." He thanks her. She compliments his coat, telling him that there's something nice about such a "simple cloth." He thanks her again. She tells him not to be a stranger. He thanks her again. Emily goes inside as Luke thanks her again. Once the door closes, Luke marvels that Emily never said anything directly bad about him or the diner: "And all I did was thank her over and over! She'd hammer me, and I'd thank her!" Lorelai says it's a talent. Luke: "'Rustic' really did sound like 'crap pile' that time." Lorelai links an arm around Luke and walks him to the truck, telling him he'll feel better about halfway home. Then he'll get nausea from the memory, and then the rich food will settle and it'll get worse and then better, and then at Route 44 he'll hit bottom. Lorelai says she'll be ready with a tongue depressor for when he tries to swallow his tongue.

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Gilmore Girls

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