"I love Cindy Lauper but like, I don't know how she moves," Lily says in choreography with Zach Woodlee. He dismisses her question, as do I, and he tells them that oh my god, the choreography is like, not that hard this week. Don't embarrass him.

In the studio with Nikki, she wants them to express the meaning of the song. What meaning? Michael has a bad session, predictably, and if Nikki weren't so distracted by her pregnancy, I imagine she'd have ousted him long ago. Abraham doesn't do well, either, and is uncomfortable with Nikki asking him to be androgynous like David Bowie. Just be anything, Abraham.

Then, Abraham freaked out a little bit ("oh my god that's my real hair,") as a black woman tried to put a wig on him for the video shoot. I enjoyed that immensely. Shanna dons a meat dress, and I feel bad for her.

Blake has decided not to go stereotypically gay for his interpretation of Boy George because, revelation, he has a gay brother. We knew there was something special about you, Blake. Robert notices that Blake is transformed, and doing very well. I suppose it's time to start rooting for him, right?

Robert and Zach notice that this is really "Ali's week," because she's very theatrical, I suppose. And she has stepped up to the plate accordingly. Michael is playing Elvis, and they notice a change in him, but come on, what kind of Las Vegas nonsense is this? Some grocery store clerk imagining they are Elvis? If only, right? God, all these wigs are so bad.

Nellie, as Britney Spears, does not understand why they always want her to be sexy but look around, girlfriend, you're all they've got. Lily is the same as always, even as a garish Cindy Lauper, and I hope she is eliminated soon. But it's probably Nellie's time to go. She's just so well-adjusted, and her concerns and insecurities are so relatable.

Shanna's meat dress stinks, and so does Abraham's interpretation of David Bowie. But Robert and Zach agree that "every one of them is on fire."

The music video confuses me. They're all working, and yet the store is empty. Shouldn't the shift manager have sent a few people home by now? Especially the baggers. And why are they scanning all that fruit if there's no one buying it? Why are they even scanning fruit? Don't you enter that into the register manually? Someone who has never been to a grocery store wrote this, and I need answers. As the grocery store clerks, the contestants all look sulky and over it, and it makes me just loathe them. When you have a job, no matter how beneath it you think it is, you should show up ready to work. I would never hire them to work at my empty grocery store, even to scan all the fruit.