Glee

Episode Report Card
Demian: B+ | Grade It Now!
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Mullet With Headlights?

Once all that's over with, Kurt meets with the other dejected Hammer Pants out in the hall, where they quickly decide that if they want to be seen as badasses, they'll "have to do something more terrifying than Rachel's personality": Admit to posting Sue's "Physical" video to YouTube. DUN!

Sue's Office. Tension mounts, not only on the soundtrack, where the strings are going all Bernard Herrmann on our collective ass, but also in Sue's voiceover, as it narrates the following most distressing journal entry: "I don't know how much longer I can take the humiliation. The video has just surpassed three million hits -- is my misery some kind of karmic retribution for the way I've treated people?" Dun-dun-DUN! The phone rings. "You're go for Sue," Sue hesitantly answers. The oddly accented voice on the other end of the line asks, "Hello?" right before the shot cuts over to reveal... Miss Olivia Newton-John! Wearing sunglasses at night. Shut up, Miss Olivia Newton-John. International recording artists like her don't listen to the likes of little old me, though, and she instead carries on to introduce herself like so: "It's Olivia Newton-John, star of Grease, the most successful movie musical of all time?" Liar. "Nice try," Sue snaps, "and that's a ridiculous accent." SLAM! Sue returns to her distressing journal entry to confess, "I've learned my lesson: Sue Sylvester's gotta start playing nice full time." "NOOOOOOOOO!" screams the audience as one. Fortunately, the phone rings again. "Hi, we must have got cut off?" Miss Olivia Newton-John begins without even waiting for Sue to speak. "It's Olivia Newton-John -- I released a record seven consecutive number-one singles?" On the Adult Contemporary chart, maybe. Liar. "Sing something!" Sue challenges, so Miss Olivia Newton-John warbles out a couple of bars of "Physical," and Sue's so shocked, she bobbles her phone. Internationally renowned animal rights activist Miss Olivia Newton-John explains she's on her way to a ribbon-cutting ceremony for a koala sanctuary, but she just had to ring, because she saw Sue's video on YouTube, and long story short, because internationally renowned environmental rights activist Miss Olivia Newton-John "botched" the first video for "Physical" by filling it with too many fat white guys in Spandex, she'd like to meet tomorrow morning after chairing a Save The Rainforest benefit at Kings Island to chat. Would Sue be free, by any chance?

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Glee

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