At some point, a freshly spurned Single-T Tina joins Not-So-Unique on the vocals, and they proceed to angrily stalk New Puck through the school, sneering with contempt as he casually toys with and discards the affections of various extras, the latter of whom fall in line one by one behind Not-So-Unique until there's a veritable army of pissed-off women stomping after the utterly oblivious New Puck. God help me, but it's pretty cute. Anyway, it all ends up in the gymnasium -- New Puck apparently has a thing for ogling the ladies during their gym class, don't you know -- and at Not-So-Unique's prompting, the various rebuffed handmaids of McKinley High lasso New Puck with a magically-appearing noose, the better to drag his horny ass towards a delightfully gruesome Particicution. Unfortunately, the song cuts off just before the gals start rending the flesh from his bones with their bare hands, so I've got to listen to Boring New Rachel and Her Dire Headband make schmoopy noises in New Puck's general direction until he asks her out on a date. Yawn.
New York City. Dean Geyer, looking lovely in a tight black beater, ostentatiously crunches his abs next to that gorgeous fountain in City Hall Park until Much-Abused Rachel wanders up to wonder if he'd partner with her for Drunk Kate Hudson's tango class. Despite some initial misgivings -- Drunk Kate Hudson frowns upon upperclassmen consorting with her freshmen, you see -- Dean Geyer agrees.
Smash to the music room, where Lady Lips Von Bieberhausen, Single-T Tina, and Guy With Gross Hair Whose Name I Can't Be Bothered To Look Up perform a shockingly engaging a cappella version of "3" that sounds immeasurably better than Other Britney's appallingly overproduced original of same. And I say "sounds," there, because I can't actually watch their performance, because watching their performance would involve watching Guy With Gross Hair Whose Name I Can't Be Bothered To Look Up sing about having a threeway, and that's a level of horror no human being should be forced to endure.
In any event, at some point during the number, Brit-Brit calmly rises from her place in the cheap seats, crosses to a nearby electrical outlet, plugs in an electric shaver she just happened to be lugging around in her backpack, and makes to shear off her lovely bleach-blonde locks -- much to the very loud dismay of Not-So-Unique, among others. Coach Sylvester has taken away Brit-Brit's high pony, you see, and if Brit-Brit can't have her high pony, Brit-Brit doesn't want to have any hair at all. Awwwwwwwwwwwww. Mr. Schue somehow manages to wrest the shaver from Brittany's hands, so the poor little thing mopes her lonely way out into the hallway, whereupon she's immediately beset by Jewfro[less] and his intrusive microphone, whereupon she immediately retrieves an umbrella from her locker to beat him to death. Atta girl. I still haven't forgiven him for this, so Brittany? Be sure to aim for his crotch. Thanks!