Oh, and speaking of shitty storylines: Puck. We've cut over to the boys' locker room where, after Dreamboat Blaine offers Gaylord Wiener a few savvy hair gel tips, Frankenteen lurches to his ungainly feet to draw Puck's absence to his fellows' attention. The boys make it their mission in life to help Puck pass his European Geography test, and then it's off to...

...the hallowed halls of dear McKinley High, where Idiot Rachel flies up to St. Gay Of Lima to shriek, "This is insanity!" and for a second, I think she's talking about this show's horribly misguided decision to tackle the issue of domestic violence in a single standalone episode at the end of an incredibly tedious season already overflowing with similarly misguided and overly sententious installments, but she's actually talking about St. Gay's decision to drop the supposedly too-safe "Music Of The Night" in favor of the entirely un-fresh and totally predictable "Not The Boy Next Door" from The Boy From Oz, so I immediately tune out her yammering trap in favor of focusing in on that inexplicable black nail polish of hers. There's just something wrong about Rachel Berry wearing black nail polish, you know? Though perhaps it's meant as a sly reference to the impending death of all her hopes and dreams, because she's totally going to biff her audition for Fake Drama School In New York later in the episode.

Kidding! I'm kidding, because this show would never even try to pull off anything like that with the costuming -- they probably just thought it would be cute to match her nails with the detailing on the $378 Nanette Lepore cocktail dress Idiot Rachel decided to wear to school today. So, Idiot Rachel warns St. Gay against taking so great a risk with his audition for Fake Drama School In New York, and St. Gay of course counters that his audition for Fake Drama School In New York practically demands so great a level of risk-taking, but she eventually convinces him to go with the number from Phantom, anyway, presumably because it will allow him to change his mind at the very last instant in the most dramatic manner imaginable.