Music Room. Miss Pillsbury and Bloaty The Gravy Clown present "The First Annual William McKinley High School Diva Award" to Single-T Tina (just go with it), and after the celebrations are done, Tina meets up with Dreamboat Blaine to bring their messy little subplot to a tidy little end. For whatever stupid reason, he apologizes to her, and then he proposes they attend Mr. Schue's wedding next week as each other's plus-one. Tina happily accepts both his apology and his invitation, and they link arms to skip off towards their next adventure together. Or something like that.
My Ancestral Homeland. The Horrible Hooker Of Broadway's barricaded herself in her bedroom, the better to nurse her many psychic wounds in private, but St. Gay Of Lima bursts in anyway in order to deliver a pep-talk so preposterous that I have little choice but to blow right past it, and by the time he's done, The Horrible Hooker has seen the error of her ways, and she vows to be a better person in the future. God, I hate him.
Meanwhile, back in Lima, Crazy Emma completely loses what's left of her goddamned mind over those floral arrangements from earlier -- we're talking full-fledged screaming fit, here, and right in the middle of her office, too -- so Bloaty The Gravy Clown shoves his tongue down her throat. Surprisingly, this calms her down. Unsurprisingly, they're both so mortified by what he's done that Frankenteen has little choice but to lurch from her office into this evening's final commercial break in a blind panic. So, you know. That probably sucks for him.
We return to find Brittany and Santana meeting up backstage at The April Rhodes Civic Pavilion for a little chat, and long story short, Brit-Brit found out Santana was lying about Elaine. "She told me that you paid her with scratcher tickets and an Ani DiFranco t-shirt to pretend to be your girlfriend." Heh. "And I also know that you dropped out of school," Brittany adds. "Well, I'm moving on up!" Santana counters. "Sue offered me a job to train to take over the Cheerios after she dies!" "You can't do that," Brit-Brit sighs, all sad and such. "But why?" Santana frowns. "I mean, it's not like I'd have to wait that long -- I'm totally gonna ricin her protein shakes in a couple of years." Atta girl. That's not quite what Brittany was talking about, however. No, Brit-Brit actually meant that Santana can't keep hiding herself away in podunk little backwaters like Lima and Louisville anymore -- she needs to find a real community, in a place that's "as big and as hot" as she is, so she can finally follow her real dreams. Gee, I wonder where that could be. Anyone have any ideas? Anyone?