Episode Report Card
Demian: D | 2 USERS: B-
The Tribulation Of Saint Kurt

In any event, Burt cheerily warns Kurt against indulging in anything "too extravagant," for he intends to spend whatever savings they have on a honeymoon in Waikiki at "the hotel where they put up the guest stars on Lost." Classy. Carole finally makes note of Finn's downcast demeanor and wonders what gives. "I guess I'm just kind of stunned," he mumbles, indeed looking like someone's just whapped him upside the head with a mallet, and I'd compliment Cory Monteith on his mad acting skillz in this particular moment were it not for the fact that "just whapped upside the head with a mallet" tends to be Finn's default expression. Burt, mindful of last season's unpleasantness, assures Finn he's already looking for a bigger house so everybody can have their own rooms, and Carole urges, "C'mon, Finn! Be happy for me!" Finn insists he is, and I'm sure he's telling the truth, but he's so clearly miserable at the prospect of being tethered to Kurt in this way that I'm certain we've arrived at his central conflict for the evening, and words cannot express how much I already hate this episode. Burt obliviously blows past all of this, however, in favor of instructing his son like so: "I want you to take care of one thing -- I don't care about the food or the booze at this party, but I want one heck of a band." He's been eating right and exercising, you see, and thus wants "to boogie with Carole" at the reception. "It's already taken care of!" Kurt burbles, giddily clapping his hands together. "I'm gonna hire New Directions as your band, right? It won't cost you a cent! They're cheap, they're available -- long story short, you're having a Glee wedding!" Homicidal. I am positively homicidal at the moment. Title card.

"Today is a red-letter day," Sue announces in voiceover. The camera finds her at her desk in the principal's office, busily stuffing what appear to be at least five hundred wedding invitations as her voiceover continues, "The big day has finally arrived for one Sue Sylvester." "Be My Baby" kicks in on the soundtrack as Sue calls out for Becky, who's apparently acting as Sue's secretary-slash-gofer while Sue maintains control of the Maharishi's job, and Sue sends her mini-me off to the post office with a batch of freshly licked envelopes as her voiceover muses, "And to think that this joyous occasion began in horror!"

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