Episode Report Card
Demian: D | 2 USERS: B-
The Tribulation Of Saint Kurt

And when it's over, after Sue and Doris have shared a lovely harmonized moment of seeming unity in wishing that Doris stay home for a change, Doris stomps all over the mood by sighing, "Well, that wasn't as good as I thought it would be." Heh. She checks her watch, realizes she's running late for a fitting, makes note of the fact that she's wearing white to her daughter's wedding, and skedaddles, singing the last line of the song as she goes. Tinkles shoots Sue A Look.

Music room. Kurt's conducting a remedial "wedding dance seminar" for the benefit of his father and his future stepbrother, neither of whom have been known for their smooth moves on the dance floor, and wouldn't you know it? The moment Kurt and Finn clasp hands for a foxtrot, Karofsky appears in the doorway to make with the little limp-wristed faggot gestures. "What the hell was that?" Burt blurts. Saint Kurt's all, "Nothing!" but Burt won't take that for an answer, and at Finn's urging, Saint Kurt reluctantly informs his father of Karofsky's unwanted attentions as of late. Burt, no fool, knows Kurt's holding back on some important detail, so Saint Kurt's forced to admit that Karofsky threatened to kill him -- though Kurt, of course, does not provide the reasons behind that supposed threat -- and Burt immediately races out into the hallway to slam Karofsky up against a bulletin board and make with a few threats of his own. Kurt and Finn chase after him and eventually drag Burt away, and the next thing we know, we're back in...

...The Once And Future Lair Of The Maharishi, where Principal Sue's summoned Burt, Kurt, Karofsky, and Karofsky's father Paul for a chat. "So," she calmly begins, "it seems the situation has reached a boiling point." "Nothing happened!" Karofsky protests. "He's making all this stuff up!" "Hold on a sec," Paul interrupts. "You have been acting differently lately, David," he acknowledges, noting that Karofsky fils has let his grades slide in the last few months, and on top of that, Dave's been backtalking and acting out at home, so why shouldn't they all believe Kurt? "We are wasting our time," Burt declares, turning to Sue to add, "It's your job to protect the people!" "I couldn't agree more," she nods, and with that, she turns to Junior Karofsky to dispense the following bit of so-called justice: "You are hereby expelled. I will not have one student threatening the life of another. If you don't think this is fair, well, you can appeal to the school board, but you'll leave campus immediately." Shockingly enough, Paul Karofsky seems to accept this without protest, and he quietly rises to his feet to make a rather meek exit with his wayward son. Which probably means he's about to slap the district with a multimillion-dollar lawsuit, but whatever. With his primary adversary now banned from campus, Kurt heaves a tremendous sigh of relief. For his part, Burt thanks Sue for her prompt handling of the situation, and as he escorts his own wayward son from the room, Sue calls out, "Enjoy your wedding!" Well, I suppose somebody has to. Commercials.

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