We start out with a Blaine Warbler voice-over. He walks down the hall down the hall to a bulletin board and signs up for every extracurricular activity McKinley has, because -- as his V.O. tells us -- this year is his turn to shine. Which he needs to do because he misses Kurt and feels like his life is a huge empty void. And then he starts to sing Tears for Fears' "Everybody Wants to Rule the World." The song partly takes place while he's standing on stage and partly while we see him in various clubs he joined, which include the "Superhero Sidekicks Appreciation Club" where Blaine is dressed as a bow-tied Robin the Nerd Wonder. Wait, is he also wearing Catwoman's ears? Make that Robin, the Gender-Confused Nerd Wonder. He's also joined the Advanced D&D Club, where we see him in full wizard regalia. So what we're really learning is that Blaine is into cosplay. At the end of the song, Blaine is joined on stage by all of his cosplay friends. Did I mention that Blaine also signs up to run for Student Council President? Because he does, writing his name under that of the only other declared candidate, Brittany S. Pierce, much to her dismay. Title card.
Improbably Bohemian Bushwick Loft. Kurt is trying on clothes as he tells us he's been working all weekend to pick out an outfit for his interview at Mode... I mean, "Vogue.com." Where he's applied for an internship with designer and new senior editor, Wilhelmina Slater... I mean, "Isobel Wright." Not-Amanda, the receptionist, tells Kurt that Ms. Wright will see him now. (Did I mention that we had transitioned to the interview? Because we have.)
Kurt enters a realistically small and not-fantastic office to find Sarah Jessica Parker waiting for him. She tells him that she's from Columbus (finding common ground in their shared state), and that she once got food poisoning while eating at BreadStix in Lima. Anyway, Isobel tells him that she's super-impressed with him and his online gallery of fashion-forward outfits. She has an iPad full of pictures of Kurt in all of the good and not-so-good clothes he's worn over the last three seasons. Did he pay a photographer to take glamour shot of him every single day? In response to her question, he tells us that he sews most of the clothes he wears, except for that hideous diagonal half-sweater, which his aunt had stashed in the attic. Kurt, you should have left it where it was -- your aunt was trying to spare us all the sight of it. And then after a perfunctory interview, she hires him. Of course she does. What we didn't see, but what really happened right before this interview, was Isobel asking her assistant, "Why the hell am I interviewing this hick from Ohio who just graduated from high school and didn't even have the sense to apply to more than one college?" To which her assistant responded, "His father is Burt Hummel, that mechanic who was elected to Congress in that insane special election last year. Maybe if you hire him, his dad can get you an invite to a state dinner at the White House." Because that's the only way this hire makes sense outside of Kurt's masturbatory fantasies.