Locker Room. Lady Lips Von Bieberhausen leads The Glee Guys -- minus Artie, of course, who remains in his wheelchair -- through a series of exercises he calls "bro-ga" (i.e., "yoga for bros") that are designed to get the lads in the best possible shape for their impending calendar shoot. New Finn looks like he's already ruptured something. Dreamboat Blaine, on the other hand, displays perfect form and poise. Bitch. Blatantly insecure Artie complains again that he doesn't understand why they all have to go shirtless, but Lady Lips chooses to ignore him in favor of passing along some crucial quick-cut "White Chocolate Strip Tips." Rule Number One: Manscape! "Nobody wants to see those rando nipple pubes," Lady Lips lectures while slathered from navel to neck in Barbasol, "or even worse, a back that looks like Chewbacca's ass. Shave it off!" Rule Number Two: Pack a little extra! "I like baby socks," Lady Lips confesses as he slides a pair of the same into the business area of his shorts. "Just make sure the sock is clean," he warns, "so you don't get any athlete's foot on your junk." Rule Number Three: There is no Rule Number Three because it's time to get this party started!
Cue the opening bars of Nelly's "Hot In Herre" as the action hops over to the showers, and herre we go: The Glee Guys -- minus Artie, who refuses to have anything to do with the delirious idiocy that follows -- strip to shorts and sandals so a random assortment of Cheerios might hose down each and every one them with spray tan. Yes, even New Puck, who to his credit is all, "Really?" when New Quinn comes at him with the nozzle. Hee. By the way, New Finn is awfully bouncy. Just so you know. From there, we shoot back over to the music room, where the remaining Glee Gals plus Artie and Frankenteen watch, mouths agape, as the boys proceed to shit all over The J. Geils Band's "Centerfold" by pointlessly mashing sliced-up bits of it into the other song. Or maybe the remaining Glee Gals plus Artie and Frankenteen watch, mouths agape, as the boys proceed to perform scantily-clad feats of great strength by manfully tossing those random Cheerios around in the air. Your choice. The remainder of this shamefully entertaining performance is intercut with shots of the increasingly grueling physical regimen Lady Lips imposes upon himself and the others in advance of the calendar shoot, and when it's over, Bloaty The Gravy Clown shouts, "We are gonna make so much money!" The assembled children shriek and cheer, save for a conspicuously silent Artie, who leaves Frankenteen's high five hanging.